February is officially over, so the final February stats for Jordan Poole are in: 13 points and 3 assists on 45% shooting. Those are great numbers for a guy who was (and still is) on track to have one of the worst shooting performances in modern NBA history. And now Poole has carried over that momentum from February into March, starting the month off with a 17 point/7 assist game against the ‘Zards.
Since I can no longer hate on Poole’s field goal percentage and expect to be taken seriously, I will have to reassign my hate to another aspect of Poole. And that aspect is his mustache.
Speaking s one facial hair-challenged dude to another, you gotta shave that thing off, man. It doesn’t even make a full mustache. There’s a hole in the center under your nose. Not only that, but it looks all wispy. It’s like one step up (a small step at that) from those crappy mustaches that high-schoolers grow when they want to look more grown-up. Poole has shown remarkable judgement when it comes to growing out his beard (I’m assuming that his ability to grow hair on his chin is just as woefully underdeveloped as his upper-lip-hair growing ability), so why did he lapse so badly in judgement when it comes to his mustache? Does he not have any male role models who can intervene?
Oh yeah, I suppose I can also hate on him for statpadding at the end of this game, scoring seven points in the final minute and a half of game time with the game practically over. Nothing grinds my gears more than when a player who isn’t yet qualifying for a highlight video all of a sudden goes nuts at the end of a game whose conclusion is already known.