I could make some ironic statements here like “Who even needs Jeff Teague anymore” or “I don’t even know who Jeff Teague is” or “Jeff Teague is being made irrelevant right before our very eyes” but I won’t. You know why? Because Jeff Teague is still a better player than Tyus Jones. Jones might be…
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Gorgui Dieng 19 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
“Dear Diary, It is still early in the winter season here in Minnesota, thus, I have seen only scant traces of cursed white sand which all residents of this godforsaken land insist on calling “snow”. Even so, the small amounts of the devil’s sand strike into my heart a great fear, and I am wracked…
Read MoreDeMarre Carroll 22 Points Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
When DeMarre Carroll started going off in the third quarter, swishing three-pointer after three-pointer, the entire Mavs team and all Mavs fans were thinking one thing and one thing only: “The ghost of Matt Caroll has taken over the corporeal form of DeMarre Carroll and is exacting revenge on a Mavs team that never gave…
Read MoreClint Capela 22 Points Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
I am honestly outraged and a little bit sick. This is not why I make Clint Capela videos. I am not a purveyor of filth. When I undertake the creation of a Clint Capela highlight video, I expect endless alley-oop whamjams and little else. However, on this occasion, we get honest-to-goodness hook shots from the…
Read MoreBrandon Ingram Career High 32 Points Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
Last night Brandon Ingram was pitted against one of his most apt NBA comparisons, Kevin Durant, and guess what? He out-Duranted Durant. Ingram scored a career high 32 points; the original Durant scored just 29 on four more shot attempts. Ingram also recorded seven turnovers to Durant’s six. Whatever numbers Durant put up, Ingram improved…
Read MoreBen Simmons 31 Points Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
Ben Simmons stared at his coach in disbelief. “How many do I have to make?” Brett Brown, already in a sour mood, glared at Ben. “Was I not clear? Five thousand free throws. You embarrassed me tonight, and I don’t want what happened tonight to ever happen again. Five thousand makes from the stripe, then…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 12 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
Tomas Satoransky is officially the most sinister-looking player in the NBA. I don’t know who he dethroned to take that title, but he definitely has it now. I had forgotten how evil he looks, it’s been a long time since he got his one and only vid on my channel. The question is not if…
Read MoreDario Saric 24 Points Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
It’s getting cold outside. That’s what winter means in my neck of the woods, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck. Humans didn’t evolve all this way just so that we could walk outside in November and be at risk of death. And it’s just going to get colder. Dammit. Aren’t we supposed to be…
Read MoreMaxi Kleber 16 Points Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
Maxi Kleber is already so much better than Tim Ohlbrecht (the previous “next Dirk”) that it’s making me, paradoxically, a little sad. Happy as well, but also sad. I was told directly, by high-ranking Houston Rockets officials, that Ohlbrecht was “the ultimate player, perfectly suited to the NBA game, in the mold of Dirk Nowitzki…
Read MoreJrue Holiday 27 Points Full Highlights (11/29/2017)
I’ve lost track of how much money is “a lot” in the NBA these days, what with the wildly inflating cap space that teams have to play with. But 26 million for Jrue Holiday seems like it would qualify. Not only is he getting that this year, but he’s getting that for the next four…
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