“I fully expect Will Barton to become the Nuggets’ main scoring threat to end the season, averaging between 15 and 20 a game.” -DownToBuck, February the 25th, the year of our lord 2015 Just call me Nostrabuckus. Will Barton is actually only averaging 14 a game since I wrote those illuminating words, but still, close…
Read MoreGiannis Antetokounmpo 19 Points Full Highlights (3/14/2015)
I’m going to be honest with everybody. After all, honesty is what I’m all about. I don’t feel like writing the next part of “Bradley Center Bratwurst Barbarity” right now. I know where the story goes next, but it takes a lot of time to write those things, and I have other stuff I want…
Read MoreThaddeus Young 21 Points Full Highlights (3/14/2015)
Thaddeus Young, clothed in plain black sweatpants and a grey hoodie with the hood up, glanced around anxiously. This was the seediest part of Brooklyn, and if some thug recognized him for who he truly was, he would get mugged in an instant. The dealer was already late. Every second he spent out here was…
Read MoreNerlens Noel 17 Points Full Highlights (3/14/2015)
OFFICIAL NBA FLATTOPS POWER RANKINGS 1. Iman Shumpert 2. Nerlens Noel 3. Norris Cole [POWER GAP] 480. Furkan Aldemir
Read MoreGeorge Hill 30 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (3/14/2015)
George Hill suffers from the dreaded “Wilson Chandler-itis”: the life-threatening condition of having no fans at all, no, not even one. The prognosis is not good: unless he gains a few people who would be interested in his autograph, or who consider him a favored basketball player, he will retire in total anonymity, his name…
Read MoreJoel Anthony 10 Points Full Highlights (3/14/2015)
There is a good reason for why I have never done Joel Anthony highlights up until this point: he had only scored in double figures seven times before tonight. His career high in points? 13. 10 points for him is like Kobe scoring 60, and you’d definitely watch highlights of that, so here we are….
Read MoreChandler Parsons 22 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/13/2015)
Chandler Parsons looked at the iPhone in his hand. The number had been entered, ready to be dialed. It was just the matter of pressing the button. A button that would rip open old wounds. He took a deep breath. It had to be done. Before he could reverse course, he jabbed his finger at…
Read MorePhil Pressey 10 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (3/13/2015)
If the Celtics don’t dress Phil Pressey up like a leprechaun for St. Patrick’s Day, I’m going to stop making highlights of Celtics players. The confluence of variables is just to perfect to pass up: 1. Phil Pressey is short like a leprechaun 2. Phil Pressey, who is short, plays for the Celtics 3. The…
Read MoreJustin Hamilton 17 Points Full Highlights (3/13/2015)
What kind of video would this be if it didn’t show Justin Hamilton throwing down a nasty JHAM at least one time? It would be a very good one, that’s for sure. Fortunately for my viewership, J-Ham dunks on Mitch McGary so hard that McGary will be embedded into the hardwood for the rest of…
Read MoreRobert Covington 22 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (3/13/2015)
Robert Covington sat down next to his Cameroonian teammate. “Luc, we need to have a chat.” The look of alarm in Luc Richard Mbah a Moute’s face was not well-hidden. “Yeah, sure. What’s on your mind?” “You can’t keep giving bad sexual advice to these rookies, man. They don’t know any better. They trust you.”…
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