Robert Covington sat down next to his Cameroonian teammate. “Luc, we need to have a chat.”
The look of alarm in Luc Richard Mbah a Moute’s face was not well-hidden. “Yeah, sure. What’s on your mind?”
“You can’t keep giving bad sexual advice to these rookies, man. They don’t know any better. They trust you.”
Luc purposely looked anywhere other than in the direction of his teammate. “I don’t know what you mean by ‘bad sexual advice’. I just give them the information they need to succeed with women.”
“So when you told Furkan that a blowjob is when you have a girl use a blow dryer on your pubes after you get out of the shower, you think that helped him succeed with women?”
“Is that not what a blowjob is?” Luc asked innocently. “I really enjoy them, myself.”
Robert shook his head. “Don’t play stupid, Luc. I’m not a rookie, I know when you’re making stuff up.”
“So when I tell you that ‘making out’ is when you both get naked and then you help your girl put on her makeup, you don’t believe me?”
Robert paused. “Uh, well…having never actually made out with a girl before…”
“Yeah, you just take off your clothes, sit her in front of the mirror, and doll her up with whatever makeup she wants,” Luc pressed. “I can’t believe you didn’t know that.”
“I did too know that!” Robert rebutted. “I was just testing you to make sure that you knew, that’s all.” There was a pause. “I know all about making out,” he finished.
“See, not all of my advice is bad. In fact, none of it is bad. Tell me, have any of the guys gotten dumped after they internalized my wisdom and put it into practice?”
“No…” Robert said, doing the math in his head.
Luc stood up. “Case closed. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to find my girlfriend’s G-Spot.”
Robert resisted the urge to ask what a “G-Spot” was. Luc couldn’t know that he was just as bad as the rookies when it came to understanding this stuff. “Haha, yeah, I do that all time. See you.”
As soon as Luc was out of the vicinity, Robert took out his phone and began to compose a text:
“yo j-rich. whats a g spot?????”