While Dwyane Wade says his emotional farewell to Heat fans in the form of a 30-burger, while Dirk Nowitzki does the same as Jamal Crawford clings to his back and screams “but I can score 50!”, TNT was busy showing an exciting matchup between a totally checked-out Wizards team and a Celtics team that was…
Read MoreDwyane Wade 30 Points/1 Dunk/1 Final Home Game Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
What a night for the NBA, and what a night for Dwyane Wade. If I was the conspiratorial type, I would sincerely believe that the NBA scripted this 30-burger for Wade in his final home game. Maybe by itself, you can believe it, but combined with Dirk Nowitzki’s 30-burger (also in his final home game)…
Read MoreMalik Beasley 25 Points Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
Malik Beasley would totally be a candidate for the MIP Improved Player award if a.) there weren’t so many other good candidates, b.) he was averaging maybe two or three more PPG per game than he is currently averaging, and c.) Pascal Siakam experience a very temporary and very localized gravity void and got flung…
Read MoreLuka Doncic Triple Double 21 Pts/16 Rebs/11 Asts Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
Luka Doncic stood alone in the ancient underbelly of the American Airlines Center. Around him were the crumbling remains of the Spanish mission upon which the arena had been built. Some months ago, Dirk had shown him the secret stairways which led to the forgotten stone corridors and ever-burning torches. Many secrets were held here,…
Read MoreDamion Lee 20 Points Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
Damion “The Splash Brother-In-Law” Lee is another one of those seldom-used Warriors bench players who offer my only hope of ever making a video featuring a Warriors player. Given that the Warriors’ big four of Curry-Thompson-Durant-Cousins monopolizes all the touches and shots (for good reason), my opportunities to feature Warriors players on my scrub-oriented highlights…
Read MoreJahlil Okafor 30 Points/6 Dunks Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
When you think of the phrase “bucket party”, what do you think of? For me, I think of ordering a family-sized bucket of fried chicken from KFC and eating it over the course of an evening while watching NBA basketball. It’s not really a party by the conventional definition of the word because it’s just…
Read MoreChris Boucher 15 Points/2 Blocks Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
Chris “The Bouchebag” Boucher has been the mystery man for the Raptors this season. How good is he actually? Is he a being of pure potential or can he contribute on the court? Is his skinniness a hinderance or not a big deal? Is he better or worse than Lucas Nogueira? Raptors fans had all…
Read MoreJamal Crawford 51 Points/1 Final Game? Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
Jamal Crawford sprinted through the halls of American Airlines center. Whenever an arena employee or team personnel half-heartedly tried to get in his way to stop him, he just brushed them out of the way. Nobody would stop him from reaching his goal. Far behind him, he could hear the echoing sounds of many footsteps,…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki 30 Points/1 Dunk/1 Retirement Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
Dirk Nowitzki stood on the clouds. To either side of him were ornate Romanesque columns that extended into the distance until they disappeared into the haze. Seeing nothing else to do, he walked down the colonnade with only his thoughts to keep him company. Dimly, he remembered that he had just finished playing in a…
Read MoreGreg Monroe 18 Points Full Highlights (4/9/2019)
When I think about how badly Greg Monroe’s career derailed, I legitimately get sad. Normally I don’t feel emotions, much less emotions like sympathy, much less sympathy towards well-paid famous guys, but it is what it is. I can’t deny my emotions. And my emotions whenever Greg Monroe crosses my mind are predominantly sad in…
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