Derrick White needs to do something about that goatee. It makes him look like a villain on a children’s cartoon. I mean, he’d look like a cartoon character anyway no matter what he did with his facial hair, because of how huge is forehead is, but he could at least look like a non-evil one….
Read MoreBryn Forbes 20 Points Full Highlights (1/3/2019)
Bryn Forbes got the Spurs going after they went down 0-2 to start, hitting a three a minute into the game. I don’t think the Raptors hit another shot after that, and the Spurs romped on national TV to a decisive win. I admit, I bought into the storyline, and I was watching this game…
Read MoreJamal Murray 36 Points Full Highlights (1/3/2018)
2 points in the first half (on garbage free throws with 30 seconds remaining), 34 in the second half (17 in each quarter) for Jamal Murray. If he doesn’t watch out, he’s going to develop an earned reputation as a streaky scorer. The kind of guy who can score 15 consecutive points in the blink…
Read MoreBuddy Hield 29 Points Full Highlights (1/3/2019)
For the past few days, I’ve just been trying to forget about the fact that I am the target of a statewide manhunt. Well, I’m technically not the primary target. That would be Buddy, my 12-foot-tall sentient 3D-printed naked purple plastic statue of Buddy Hield that I ordered online for $3,000 bucks over a year…
Read MoreNemanja Bjelica 17 Points Full Highlights (1/3/2019)
It’s a common occurrence for me: I see a player score a considerable amount of points in the first quarter of a game, I set my expectations way too high while experiencing nearly orgasmic waves of hype all across my body, and then my hype level crashes through the floor when the player in question…
Read MoreNikola Jokic 26 Points/6 Assists/1 Dunk Full Highlights (1/3/2019)
In the dimly-lit back room of a Denver nightclub, loud swears in a language that was not English filled the air. “You rat, that was my trick!” Nikola Jokic yelled, throwing down his hand of cards in a fit of good-natured anger. “Don’t you know the damn rules?” Nemanja Bjelica took downed his cocktail in…
Read MoreKentavious Caldwell-Pope 25 Points Full Highlights (1/2/2019)
I was surprised to see the Lakers still got to play on national TV without LeBron doing his LeBronny things (checking his hairline, traveling, flopping, the usual). In the NFL, if a team like the Patriots doesn’t have a player like Tom Brady (remember, my football knowledge is at least a decade out of date,…
Read MoreJ.J. Redick 27 Points Full Highlights (1/2/2019)
I miss the days when every 76ers game was a new chance for some random 10-day contract player or other scrub/role-player to show out and have a career high. The days of Larry Drew II (Larry Drew’s crappy son) and Drew Gordon (Aaron Gordon’s crappy brother), the days of Furkan Aldemir and Tony Wroten. Hollis…
Read MoreJohn Collins 21 Points/4 Threes Full Highlights (1/2/2019)
If John Collins is just gonna keep scoring 20 points seemingly every game like this, I’m gonna have to put some tighter restrictions on his highlights. Because right now, he’s getting a vid every game. When that starts happening, I know I need to either be more selective (maybe he has to score 22 now…
Read MoreJoe Harris 21 Points Full Highlights (1/2/2019)
In a fair and just world, the three-point shootout over All-Star weekend would simply be the 8 best three-ballers in the league by percentage. No popularity contests, no meme Euro players unless they earned it, no Allen Iversons stinking it up, just the best of the best from the NBA. Right now, the top 8…
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