ATTENTION: The “T.J. Warren Hype Alert Level” has been UPGRADED from “orange – high: high risk of T.J. Warren hype” to “red – I am hyped for T.J. Warren RIGHT NOW”. Please reference the official chart: http://imgur.com/IGcsSB0 . To repeat: T.J. Warren hype levels are at RED, the highest levels of T.J. Warren hype that…
Read MoreGeorge Hill 25 Points Full Highlights (11/2/2016)
Man, that Jeff Teague-George Hill-1st rounder three-team trade thing really isn’t looking that good for the Pacers, is it? George Hill was never going to win any awards or earn any notice for being especially great, but he was a super-super solid PG. He was a nice fit on the Pacers, and now he’s replicating…
Read MoreBuddy Hield 18 Points Full Highlights (11/2/2016)
I think that Pelicans-Grizzlies game was the worst offensive in game in recent memory. 83 to 89, AFTER an overtime? Without Anthony Davis scoring 40-plus, the Pelicans are a disaster on offense. And the Grizzlies, they’re the same Grizzlies they always were except with less talent. I feel sorry for anyone who watched the entire…
Read MoreBrook Lopez 34 Points/4 Threes Full Highlights (11/2/2016)
There are a lot of things that I put up with. A lot of things. I consider myself a patient and measured person. I tolerate most injustices with nothing but a tight-lipped smile and a shrug. But even I have to draw the line somewhere. And the line I’m drawing is the three-point arc, beyond…
Read MoreDario Saric 14 Points Full Highlights (11/2/2016)
Someone must have informed 76ers commentator Marc Zumoff of the proper pronunciation of Dario Saric’s last name. Just yesterday, while Dario was scoring 21, it was “Sar-itch” this and “Sar-itch” that. Today, it’s more of a “Shar-itch”. Not as pleasing to this ignorant American, but I’m sure the other version was utterly maddening for the…
Read MoreTim Hardaway Jr. 26 Points Full Highlights (11/2/2016)
I am writing to you from the distant past, where the Cubs and Indians remain tied at 6 in the top of the 9th. By the time you read these words, you will surely know the outcome of this final and decisive game of the World Series. I, however, do not have that luxury, and…
Read MoreTim Frazier 20 Points/9 Assists Full Highlights (11/1/2016)
If Tim Frazier was a muffin, what kind of muffin would he be? Let’s analyze the facts. Bran? Bran muffins are the favored muffin of old people. Everyone knows that the favored Pelican of old people is Omer Asik, not Frazier. We can conclude that he would not be a bran muffin. Lemon Poppyseed? If…
Read MoreBuddy Hield 10 Points Full Highlights (11/1/2016)
What’s up with Buddy Hield? He was my pick for Rookie of the Year, and he’s making me look like a total DUMBASS. Me and a whole bunch of other people who figured (not without reason) that a four-year college player would be able to come in and contribute from day one. I don’t care…
Read MoreMalcolm Brogdon 14 Points Full Highlights (11/1/2016)
I’ll never forget all those sweet Gus Johnson calls from various sports. He certainly is one of the most recognizable sports commentators, able to inject excitement into the mundane and insanity into the already exciting. With that said, I kind of wish he’d chill out a bit while commentating for the Bucks. We in Wisconsin…
Read MoreHollis Thompson 22 Points Full Highlights (11/1/2016)
Another year, another dismal Sixers squad for “Alcohollis” Thompson. True, this year’s squad is considerably less dismal than years past, but Alcohollis still isn’t going to get to experience many wins. He’ll continue to shoot in the upper-30’s on threes, he’ll continue to not really have any in-between game, and he’ll continue to continually have…
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