One sad thing about Tommy Heinsohn doing fewer and fewer Celtics games is that we might never get to hear first-hand accounts of what Daniel Theis looks like in the shower (or, as Heinsohn would say, “in the SHOWAH”). If Mike Gorman or Brian Scalabrine have gotten any sneak peaks, they’re not sharing the details….
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Marcus Smart 29 Points Full Highlights (3/6/2020)
OFFICIAL REASONS WHY MARCUS SMART’S 29 POINTS DO NOT COUNT POWER RANKINGS: 1. Smart was 9-of-23 from the field and 6-of-15 from three (he was shooting too much is what I’m trying to say) 2. The Celtics lost, and, as everybody know, stats accumulated in a losing effort do not count towards anything other than…
Read MoreSemi Ojeleye Career High 22 Points/1 Injury Full Highlights (3/4/2020)
This is the first twenty-burger of Semi Ojeleye’s two-and-a-half-year-long career. It’s also the first time he’s really gotten close to twenty points; his next-highest game was seventeen points at the end of last season when the Celtics put out a lineup whose best player was Terry Rozier by a mile. This game is a bit…
Read MoreMarcus Smart 26 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (2/29/2020)
The Celtics need to take a good hard look at themselves in the mirror (or as Tommy Heinsohn would say… “in the showah”) after this loss to the Rockets. Marcus Smart is known for being a tenacious defender. So why is he being forced to take 22 shots, 15 of them threes? That’s just not…
Read MoreDaniel Theis Career High 25 Points/6 Dunks Full Highlights (2/21/2020)
“Waitress! Waitress! We gotta get ANOTHER ROUND OF STEINS OVER HERE!!!!” yelled Brad Wanamaker exuberantly as he slammed his empty mug of beer on the table. “Germany rules!!!!” As if to emphasize his love of Germany, he ripped a German flag from the wall and wrapped it around him like a cloak. “I’m glad you…
Read MoreMarcus Smart 31 Points Full Highlights (2/13/2020)
31 points for Marcus Smart is a lot. If it wasn’t for his 37-point, 11-three outburst a month ago, this would be a career-high by far. But here’s the dirty little secret that the NBA doesn’t want you to know about this performance: It occurred in a double overtime game. As the kids say, that’s…
Read MoreRomeo Langford 16 Points/3 Blocks Full Highlights (2/7/2020)
One of the bad things about good teams is that they often have a sizable stable of young talent that barely gets to play. Sometimes that’s not the case, sometimes the non-playing players are cruddy vets that no one can possibly be hyped about (shame on Lakers fans for even THINKING about getting hyped for…
Read MoreBrad Wanamaker 16 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (2/3/2020)
Two straight games of 5-for-9 from the field for Brad Wanamaker. The only reason this one had one more point than the last one is because he made all four of his free throws instead of missing one. I have been informed that he has the reputation of being the best free-throw shooter on the…
Read MoreBrad Wanamaker 15 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (2/1/2020)
I have ignored Brad Wanamaker this whole season. Sometimes willfully (I’m not going to make a vid of him scoring 4 points unless someone gives me 25 bucks on Patreon and then requests it, and even then I’m not going to feel good about it at all), sometimes unwillfully (real-life commitments meant I ran out…
Read MoreMarcus Smart 21 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (1/30/2020)
Attention Marcus Smart: only good three-point shooters are allowed to do the “shoot a corner three and turn around and stare at the opposing bench before it even goes in” move. Not average ones like yourself. Please don’t ever do it again. It worked out this time, luckily for him. What if he had missed?…
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