Lost in the glorious, overpoweringly bright aura of James Harden’s 57-point game is the smaller, less luminary aura of Danuel House’s 15-point game. He was the second-best scorer on the team, and while his contributions didn’t directly contribute to an actual win (because the Rockets won by more points [18] than House scored [15]), they…
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Austin Rivers 25 Points Full Highlights (1/13/2019)
“Dear Diary, Today we got to play in Orlando where I grew up! When I was little I went to Disney World all the time with my babysitter. It was so much fun meeting all the Disney characters like Goofy and Cinderella and Mickey. The best part is they remembered me every time I went,…
Read MoreP.J. Tucker 21 Points/7 Threes Full Highlights (1/7/2019)
The Rockets commentators could not stop bringing up the fact that P.J. “Peej” Tucker was, prior to this game, in a three-point shooting slump so deep it made the Mariana Trench look like a bike track through packed dirt, so I enlisted the help of the invaluable basketball-reference website to help me fact-check these claims….
Read MoreGerald Green 21 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (1/7/2019)
Sometimes I look at dudes like Gerald Green, the dudes who have the really cool hair patterns on their head, and I think: why doesn’t my hair do that? All my hair does is sit there. It doesn’t make any patterns. How do I get my hair to grow into patterns like that? Do I…
Read MoreAustin Rivers 21 Points Full Highlights (1/5/2019)
“Dear Diary, Today after we lost to the Blazers, coach Mike was real angry with us. He said we need to “step up” because James can’t win the game all by himself. Then he said “Austin stepped up but nobody else did” and that made me happy even though he said it an angry way….
Read MoreAustin Rivers 18 Points Full Highlights (1/3/2019)
“Dear Diary, Trades are scary when Daddy’s not around to tell you that it will all be fine. When I got traded to Phoenix verybody was sending me text messages and it was too much so I went into the bathroom and cried even though there was a part of me that was happy because…
Read MoreGerald Green 18 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (12/31/2018)
OFFICIAL GREENHOUSE STATUS UPDATE: (reminder: “Greenhouse” is my nickname for the sweet-shooting, mega-dunking tandem of Gerald Green and Danuel House) The Green part of the Greenhouse scored eighteen points on six-of-eleven three-pointers. He didn’t have any dunks, but his three-pointers were definitely of the “sick” variety. No stand-still catch-and-shoots here. The House part of the…
Read MoreDanuel House 16 Points Full Highlights (12/31/2018)
Seeing the name Danuel House reminds me of his nickname, “House Party”, and the concept of a house party serves as a neat transition into the real meat of this video description, which will describe how the events of New Year’s Eve unfolded in the DTB household. Sorry Danuel. You’re getting ignored from here on…
Read MoreGerald Green 17 Points Full Highlights (12/15/2018)
Since I am so tickled by my new “Greenhouse” moniker for the deadly three-point shooting, high-flying tandem of Gerald Green and Danuel House, I now present you: the OFFICIAL GREENHOUSE STATUS UPDATE: The Green part of the Greenhouse held up his end of the bargain by scoring seventeen points on just six shot attempts. He…
Read MoreDanuel House 15 Points Full Highlights (12/13/2018)
The more I think about it, the more it seems to me that Danuel House is just a younger version of Gerald Green. House can dunk, he can shoot threes, he doesn’t do much else, and he’s got cornrows. Those are four big similarities between him and Green. This tandem hasn’t shown itself to be…
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