Jon Leuer – DownToBuck

Jon Leuer 22 Points Full Highlights (3/1/2017)

Jon Leuer attemped 23 field goals tonight, by far a career high. I don’t know what got into him. He was being guarded by short dudes way too much, which probably factored into his mindless (by his standards, not by Brandon Jennings standards) chucking. Also, his teammates were all sucking. One of the cardinal rules…

Jon Leuer 24 Points Full Highlights (2/3/2017)

Jon Leuer and Darrun Hilliard stood in awe of the booty that surrounded them. The Parent-Teacher Association meeting they had just entered was about to start and neither of them knew where to begin. “What do we do now?” Darrun asked under his breath, leaning closer to his teammate so they wouldn’t be overheard. “There’s…

Jon Leuer 22 Points Full Highlights (12/30/2016)

One of the most underrated catchphrases in American sports commentating is Greg Kelser’s (the Pistons color commentator) “nice” after the Pistons do something good. Sometimes he follows it up with additional commentary, but a lot of the time he just lets it hang out there by itself. “Nice.” I love it. If the Pistons ever…

Jon Leuer 17 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (12/16/2016)

“Okay,” Jon Leuer said to his teammate Darrun Hilliard as they munched on greasy pizza in the dining area of the Chuck E. Cheese’s. “No more screwing around. We have to find somewhere to pick up chicks.” “But I haven’t even played the Skee-ball yet,” Darrun whined. “You know I’m going to get hella tickets…

Jon Leuer 19 Points Full Highlights (12/14/2016)

Jon Leuer approached Marcus Morris with a bit more swagger than was normal for him. “‘Sup, Marcus. I got an offer you can’t refuse.” Marcus raised an eyebrow. “I bet I can refuse if it’s you who’s offering it.” Disregarding the subtle insult, Jon pressed forward. “I’m extending an official offer for you to be…

Jon Leuer 22 Points Full Highlights (3/23/2016)

Leuer Alcindor is quietly having a pretty good season for the not-very-good Suns. It’s a contract year for him, the cap is expanding, and there’s a market for stretch fours. If he was going to pick a time to play well, now would be a good time; he stands to get paid more dollars per…

Jon Leuer 19 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2016)

What sort of sick, unfeeling universe do we live in where a replay of Jon Leuer dunking all over Nikola Jokic, so that we might be able to relive the poster party, isn’t even provided? There have been many epistemological arguments for the non-existence of a god. This might be the most conclusive. A hypothetical…

Jon Leuer 20 Points Full Highlights (12/2/2015)

Take a look at the videos I have done so far tonight: Kristaps Porzingis – White Devin Booker – White? Frank Kaminsky – White/Pink Mirza Teletovic – White Jon Leuer – White Notice a trend? I think I’m noticing a trend. In this age of rampant racism, where a man cannot just be a man,…

Jon Leuer 20 Points Full Highlights (11/25/2015)

I’m pretty much over the Tobias Harris trade. I still have the occasional sobbing breakdown when I think about it, but those are getting less and less common. I am most decidedly NOT over the Leuer trade, though. What the heck? We traded this guy and a bunch of other stuff for Fat Ass Dalembert?…

Jon Leuer 16 Points Full Highlights (12/21/2014)

Jon Leuer looked unhappily at his reflection in the mirror. He had been noticing things for the past few weeks that were becoming harder and harder to ignore. Standing straight up, he let his face rest in a neutral position; seeing the reflected image of this made him wince. He could no longer deny it:…