Aaron Gordon’s remark of “People aren’t going to take us lightly and if they do, we’re going to blow them out.” looked good when he said it, back when the Magic were winning games and looking unstoppable on offense. Turns out, their three-point shooting was unsustainable, Gordon won’t score 40 every night and even if…
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Mario Hezonja 14 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (12/26/2017)
For those keeping score at home, this performance makes 6 of 8 good (“good” meaning double-digit scoring, I don’t have time to figure out if these are actually good or not) games for Mario Hezonja since he started getting major minutes regularly. The Magic have lost all those games, but they were going to lose…
Read MoreWes Iwundu 12 Points Full Highlights (12/23/2017)
This is Wesley Iwundu. He is a rookie for the NBA’s Orlando Magic. Due to the sorcery of a witch, the Orlando Magic are cursed with injuries to their key players. Iwundu, not being a key player, was spared the curse, and is now playing 20 minutes a game even though he is realistically a…
Read MoreElfrid Payton Career High 30 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (12/23/2017)
Elfrid Payton just scored 30 points, which is more than he has ever scored before and maybe more than he will ever score again, and also added 10 assists for good measure, but there was not a single point in this video where I considered myself “excited”. He’s capable of putting nice stats on occasion,…
Read MoreMario Hezonja 16 Points Full Highlights (12/23/2017)
The Magic are now so injured, and thus, so bad, that Mario Hezonja is now one of their better options on offense. They might never win a game again, but at least we get to see the Croatian Crustacean unleashed against real NBA competition for 30 minutes a night. In my opinion, that is worth…
Read MoreJonathon Simmons 22 Points Full Highlights (12/22/2017)
Out of all the players you could blame for the Magic having a tragic 11-22 record, Jonathon Simmons is the one who you should blame the least. I thought the contract he got was kind of an overpay, but he came in and showed that he doesn’t need the Spurs’ system to be successful. Here’s…
Read MoreAdreian Payne 10 Points Full Highlights (12/20/2017)
So, it’s a little bit embarrassing to admit, but I was completely befuddled by the free throws which appear at the end of this video. The thing is, Shelvin Mack was shooting free throws with 1:27 left in the fourth quarter. That’s the same exact time that Adreian “Still Better than Cameron” Payne was supposed…
Read MoreMario Hezonja 12 Points Full Highlights (12/20/2017)
Yes, I know this isn’t very many points for Mario Hezonja, especially after he just scored 28 last game. But I’m getting super tired, and this one took no time at all to put together, so here we are. Besides, he made 5 shots, which is a pretty decent amount for him. If you don’t…
Read MoreNikola Vucevic 24 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/17/2017)
Nikola Vucevic has now played three straight games, almost 100 minutes of playing time, without shooting a free throw. He has taken 54 shots in that time frame. How is that even possible? I’m freaking out right now. This guy must be the most contact-averse player in the whole league. Right up there with E’Twaun…
Read MoreJonathon Simmons 23 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/17/2017)
There aren’t a ton of people in the NBA that have made more shots than Jonathon Simmons this season. Only 41. I don’t normally think “bucket getter” when I think about Simmons, maybe you do, and that’s your right as a free American citizen (if you are not American then please stop watching my videos…
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