We need a nickname or term for all these players who are suddenly SHOWING OUT in the bubble. And the term has to involve the word “bubble” in some way. Something like “Bubble Breakouts”, but I want it to be more creative than that. Who do I have to pay to generate creative ideas for…
Read MoreTag: Portland Trailblazers
Gary Trent Jr. 21 Points/7 Threes Full Highlights (8/2/2020)
Gary Trent Jr. is in that intermediate stage of hair growth where the hair is long enough to be tied back, but not ALL of it is long enough to be tied back. So he’s got the ponytail going on in the back but then he’s got some insect antennae sticking out the front because…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 30 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (8/2/2020)
Getting Jusuf Nurkic back from an extended absence to have him dominate games like he had never gotten his leg bones spontaneously blown into six (or more) different pieces is obviously awesome for the Blazers. But it’s also sort of a sad thing. Because when you see how quickly and easily Nurkic has integrated himself…
Read MoreGary Trent Jr. 17 Points Full Highlights (7/31/2020)
Gary Trent Jr. is cool and all, but I’ve been told by about a million different Blazers fans that Anfernee Simons is their young stud of the future, and he didn’t even play in this game. What the heck, Blazers fans? Okay, so maybe I’m exaggerating about the “million” part. Maybe there are a million…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 18 Points/5 Assists/6 Blocks Full Highlights (7/31/2020)
This is Jusuf Nurkic’s first “real” NBA game since he did unmentionable things to his leg near the end of the 2018-19 season. What better way for him to return to the league and make his presence felt than by putting up the Nurkician statline of 18/9/5/2/6? Meanwhile, the forgotten man Hassan Whiteside, who was…
Read MoreC.J. McCollum All 139 Midrange Jumpers Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Jumperilation)
I sit at my computer desk, hungrily perusing the menus of various restaurants on GrubHub but knowing that all of them are out of my price range. The life of an NBA highlight maker is not an extravagant one, and to splurge on something other than Hot Pockets for dinner is a rare indulgence. Still,…
Read MoreDamian Lillard All 226 Three-Pointers Full Highlights (2019-20 Three-ilation Part II)
“This isn’t gonna work. At all.” J.J. Hickson was standing in front of the mirror in the locker room, alternating his gaze between his own reflection and the picture of LaMarcus Aldridge that was up on his phone. “Our faces are totally different. There’s no way that I trick Neil into thinking I’m LaMarcus.” “I…
Read MoreDamian Lillard All 226 Three-Pointers Full Highlights (2019-20 Three-ilation Part I)
Damian Lillard sat, waiting, in one of the many conference rooms that could be found in the office building where the Blazers’ front office was located. He had a meeting scheduled with Neil Olshey, the Blazers’ general manager, and he wasn’t looking forward to it. His previous encounters with the executive had been…strange, to put…
Read MoreCarmelo Anthony All 125 Midrange Jumpers Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Jumperilation)
Carmelo Anthony was walking through a narrow alley in a bid to find a quicker route to his parked car. He knew that it wasn’t a good idea to take a solitary walk through an unfamiliar area at night, but he was big enough that nobody would mess with him. Hopefully. The distant streetlight at…
Read MoreTrevor Ariza 22 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2020)
I’m trying to figure out why Trevor Ariza is so much better in Portland than he was in Sacramento. I think I may have discussed this quandary before, so forgive me for rehashing it, but it really is an interesting mystery to me. Both teams are aimlessly locked in a battle for the eighth seed…
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