Bogdan Bogdanovic 19 Points Full Highlights (1/1/2019)

Bogdan Bogdanovic was pretty bad most of this game outside of one stretch during the fourth quarter (and the very butt-end of the third). Luckily for you, you don’t have to relive all the bricks and turnovers, because I have prepared for you something special: a video containing only the good things that he did,…

Read More

Buddy Hield 28 Points Full Highlights (1/1/2018)

The aftermath of my nighttime zoo excursion with Buddy, my 12-foot-tall sentient naked purple 3D-printed purple plastic statue of Buddy Hield, that had the stated goal of petting the cute goats but ended with Buddy killing five different dudes, was overall easy to deal with. That’s because I adopted an “I did nothing wrong” mantra,…

Read More

De’Aaron Fox 26 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/30/2018)

Is there anything more fun than out-of-touch NBA team twitter accounts that use emojis and slang to try and relate to the younger generation? I don’t think so. Here’s the deal, people: no one is fooled. Young people aren’t fooled. Old people aren’t fooled (rather, confused). There was a time when teams tried to be…

Read More

Bogdan Bogdanovic 21 Points Full Highlights (12/30/2018)

First item on the agenda: send Bogdan Bogdanovic to the barber. The way he got it cut last time looked fine when it was short, but now that it’s growing out he looks like a combination of an extra from a kid’s TV show and a mushroom. When you’re on TV every other day, you…

Read More

Iman Shumpert 18 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (12/27/2018)

Iman “Dumpert” Shumpert doesn’t exactly fit into the Kings’ long term plans, given that he’s a.) too old (28) and b.) under contract for just this season. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if he got traded at the deadline, just because overpaid players on the last years of their deals tend to get traded…

Read More

Nemanja Bjelica 18 Points Full Highlights (12/27/2018)

Nemanja Bjelica has cooled off since his hot start, but the trend remains the same: when he does good (I’m defining “good” here as “scoring points”), the Kings do good. If he scores in single-digits, they’re almost guaranteed to lose. This trend, obviously, exists for a lot of players in the league, and it usually…

Read More

Bogdan Bogdanovic 23 Points/1 Game-Winner Full Highlights (12/27/2018)

Damn, this Bogdan Bogdanovic buzzer-beating game-winner has got me all hyped up. I’m, officially, in the hype zone right now. Like, really officially. My heart is beating at a million miles per hour, my vision is tunnelling, I can’t really feel my arms, and there’s a loudening ringing in my ears. Almost deafening. If this…

Read More

Willie Cauley-Stein 22 Points Full Highlights (12/23/2018)

I’m not the best person to comment on another’s fashion or style, since my knowledge of what’s fashionable and stylish is sourced only from observing how midwesterners dress (on the rare occasion I actually go outside to see them). However, I just want to say this: the cornrows aren’t working out for Willie Cauley-Stein. Not…

Read More

Buddy Hield 28 Points Full Highlights (12/23/2018)

When I woke up the next morning, I did what I usually do, which is scratch my ass, throw on some clothes, put a little bit of food and water in Japurri’s bowls (he doesn’t shut up until I do that for him) and trundle to my computer to get started on the day’s activities…

Read More

Bogdan Bogdanovic 24 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/23/2018)

I don’t want to sound alarmist or anything, and I definitely don’t want to sound like I’m body-shaming anybody (all sizes and shapes are beautiful!), but does Bogdan Bogdanovic look a little… tubby to you? Like he’s enjoying the wonderful variety of American fast food a little too much? It’s slight, definitely. Not like he’s…

Read More