“Gorgui, I need some of your good old-fashioned West African widsom right now.” Zach LaVine had trundled over to Gorgui Dieng’s locker, looking sad. Gorgui turned to face him with a stern expression. “I seem to remember young Zach asking before for sage advice, but when Gorgui try to tell story of The Fish who…
Read MoreZach LaVine 20 Points Full Highlights (3/19/2015)
I don’t know what the hell Zach LaVine thought he was doing at the end of the game tonight against the Knicks. He made those 4 free throws at the end, knowing full well that a win would leave New York as the undisputed worst team in the league, thus making them the most likely…
Read MoreElfrid Payton Triple Double 15 Pts/12 Asts/10 Rebs Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
I would’ve taken the shot too. Just grabbed the last rebound for my triple double, dribbling up the court, the chance to take the go-ahead shot with 30 seconds left after trailing the whole game? I ain’t passing. That ball is going up, and it’s going in the hole. It’s what every kid dreams about….
Read MoreGiannis Antetokounmpo 19 Points Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
Fame is fleeting. Just as Giannis Antetokounmpo started putting up some monster scoring nights, the eye of the basketball public had already redirected its gaze to a new intriguing foreigner with insane physical gifts, Rudy Gobert. People still like Giannis and everything, but Rudy is the hotter topic right now. It doesn’t help that the…
Read MoreMaurice Harkless 18 Points/6 Dunks Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
After being freed from King Vaughn’s dungeon, Moe Harkless has emerged from his comatose state to actually do okay in the past few games. By “do okay”, I of course mean “get minutes”. Moe’s been a bit garbagey since the coaching change, but that can be explained by his ass cheeks getting chemically fused to…
Read MoreHarrison Barnes 25 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
Does anybody else get really mad when fans start getting excited in the arena? I don’t know, it just annoys me for some reason, since my way of watching basketball is to stare, mouth agape, at the screen, with no emotion or feeling. When the commentators start getting louder and louder, and the crowd all…
Read MoreEnes Kanter 22 Points Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
Enes Kanter listened to the voicemail message again. “Hiiii! You’ve reached Jesseca’s voicemail, which means I can’t take your call right now! Leave a message and I’ll get back to you!” Of course, Enes didn’t leave a message. He couldn’t. Jesseca had surely viewed their budding relationship just as any cheerleader would view a relationship…
Read MoreHedo Turkoglu 19 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
I thought Hedo Turkoglu was done for sure. Like, doner than Kobe Bryant. That’s how done I thought he was. You can go back to two seasons ago he still looked like he was all out of gas, and even large amounts of bull shark testosterone injected directly into his nads couldn’t give him the…
Read MoreKevin Martin 37 Points Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
Does YouTube not realize how time-sensitive these NBA highlight vids are? I can’t wait around for hours waiting for these things to “process”, a term I take to mean “endure the hell of YouTube’s byzantine application architecture”. God damn it. Every minute these things aren’t up means tons of disappointed people not able to watch…
Read MoreNikola Mirotic 25 Points Full Highlights (3/18/2015)
It took a whole bunch of injuries to almost all of the Chicago Bulls’ roster, but Nikola Mirotic is finally getting decent playing time. What took so long? Tom Thibodeau might be a good coach, but his minute allotment is just crazy, and when he gets fired it will be understandable. Niko has taken it…
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