The phone rang. Taking a break from reading mean comments about him from 76ers fans on the internet, Andrew Bynum stretched lazily to answer.
Through a chorus of unsuppressed giggling, Bynum could make out some words.
“Hey man it’s me, wanna go bowling?”
“Tristan, man, this wasn’t funny the first time you did it and it sure as hell ain’t funny now.”
There was nothing but silence on the other end. Andrew ended the call and went back to the blog comments where people were talking about his ugly hair. A few minutes later, the phone rang again. He looked at it warily, but decided, possibly against his better judgment, to answer.
“Hey Andrew! It’s Sergey. Let’s go bowling.”
Bynum threw his phone down on the sofa. Muttering angrily, he resumed his perusal of the internet, this time talking about how much better Nikola Vucevic is compared to himself. Without much delay, the phone rang again. This time, he was prepared.
“God damn it you guys, stop pretending you’re Niko from GTA4 and asking me to go bowling! Can’t you give it a rest? It ain’t cool to make fun of someone’s injury situation. I hope you jerkoffs all die. I’ll be bowling on your god-damn graves.”
“Andrew Bynum, you will learn to show yo momma some respect! You can forget about Christmas presents until you clean out your mouth young man!”
“Mom, I’m so sorry, I thought it was the guys on the team!”
“I’ll survive. I’ve heard worse language before. And Andrew?”
“Wanna go bowling?”