March 2015 – Page 2

Jordan Clarkson 26 Points/11 Assists/1 Game-Winner Full Highlights (3/30/2015)

How do these Jordan Clarkson videos keep coming out so lengthy? I swear I set my brevity mode as high it would go and this vid is still way over four minutes. The game-winner really adds a bunch, but this has happened before. God damn it. I don’t even like Clarkson anymore. I think I’m…

Avery Bradley 30 Points Full Highlights (3/30/2015)

I love it when players do exactly what they’re supposed to. You would be displeased if DeAndre Jordan started taking only midrange jumpers. Same if Kyle Korver abandoned his three-ball and turned into a low-post savant. There is no greater joy than when you see a statline, and the corresponding video lines up neatly with…

Andrew Wiggins 17 Points/3 Poster Dunks Full Highlights (3/30/2015)

You can put to rest all those criticisms about Andrew Wiggins not dunking it with enough power. Embalm them, stick them in a coffin, put them in a hole in the ground, cover said hole with earth, and erect a tombstone: ————___ ———–(—–) ————_)(_ ______/——\\_____ |—————————|| |—_ ————–_ —–|| |—|-\——-|——|-\—–|| |—|–|——|——|–|—-|| |—|-/——-|——|-/—–|| |—|-\——-|——|——-|| |—|–\——|——|——-|| |—|—\—–|——|——-||…

Jabari Brown Career High 22 Points Full Highlights (3/30/2015)

OFFICIAL ALL-TIME NBA JABARI POWER RANKINGS 1. Jabari Brown 3. Jabari Parker’s right knee 2. Jabari Smith 4. Jabari Parker’s left knee I can understand the ordering of this list causing some consternation among dedicated NBA fans. Jabari Brown is unproven, but significantly better than Jabari Parker’s left knee. It’s closer between him and Jabari…

C.J. Miles 28 Points Full Highlights (3/29/2015)

C.J. “Cold Justice” Miles has been pretty streaky this year. Unfortunately for Pacers fans, his streaks tend more towards “total bricklayer from behind the arc” than “steel-hearted three point murderer”. Is it unreasonable to say that if Miles had played up to the expectations set by the rest of his body of work (at least…

Udonis Haslem 18 Points Full Highlights (3/29/2015)

Udonis Haslem’s role on the Heat has been steadily lessening in the past few years. He’s only under contract for one more year. Will that be it for the Heat’s all-time leading rebounder? Probably. He’s old. When all is said and done, Haslem’s career-long tenure on the Heat will be remembered with a mix of…

James Ennis 16 Points Full Highlights (3/29/2015)

Do you care about old man Dwyane Wade pretending it’s 2005 again and scoring forty points? Too bad. I do not care about such a performance, impressive as it may be, and will not make a video immortalizing it. Instead, I am excited for James Ennis tying his season high with sixteen points. If you…

T.J. Warren 18 Points Full Highlights (3/29/2015)

“Wow! Eighteen points for T.J. Warren!” you exclaim as you scroll through your subscription feed. “Wait a minute. I watched the highlights for his seventeen-point game, and it was just a bunch of lame layups. If I watch this, it will just be more of the same.” You look at the other videos in line…

Markel Brown 17 Points/1 Dunk Full Highlights (3/29/2015)

The referees in the NBA must have no control over the game. Markel Brown dunked all over the Lakers, and he didn’t even get ejected for it! These supposed pro-quality refs should take a few points from their NCAA equivalents. If a player dunks it too hard, without the proper respect for the game, that…