Giannis Antetokounmpo 15 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

If this performance had happened last year, people would be falling all over themselves to watch this vid. Now, it’s like people don’t even care unless he scores 25. I guess that’s a good thing, because it shows how much he has improved over his rookie season, but still. Can’t we go back to the…

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Michael Kidd-Gilchrist 18 Points Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

Michael Kidd-Gilchrist walked aimlessly through the foggy landscape. All around him he could hear metallic clanking sounds, but they seemed to have no source other than his ears. The only discrete objects he could discern were large numbers of lone bricks scattered upon the ground, some of them broken nearly to dust, others large and…

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Andre Drummond 18 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

How convenient that the one time Brad Stevens deploys the “Hack-a-Drummond” strategy, Drummond manages to hit both free throws! He missed all the others, but those were off of real fouls. No team will want to deliberately foul Drummond if he’s just going to sink the throws every time they do. Just kidding! Teams should…

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Lance Thomas Career High 24 Points/2 Threes Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

So, I didn’t realize it, but Lance Thomas had not made a three-pointer before this game. That blows my mind. He’s a small forward. What kind of small forward can’t shoot threes? Let me rephrase that. What kind of small forward could go several years in the league without shooting threes? The spell has now…

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Amar’e Stoudemire 16 Points Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

Dammit Steve! You weren’t supposed to retire. You were supposed to come back to Dallas, ply your trade one final time with Amar’e and Dirk. It was too perfect, and now, we never get to witness your wizardry ever again… It’s not too late to change your mind, right? Stoudemire still has it, all you…

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Tiago Splitter 23 Points Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

This is a lot of points for Tiago Splitter. His career high is 25, and this is 23. So why does this video feel so lame? I blame Tiago Splitter himself. He’s just not an exciting player. In any way. The most exciting thing about him is that he kind of looks like Butt-Head from…

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Jeremy Lin 29 Points Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

Jeremy Lin’s mind whirled, frantic thoughts chasing each other through the labyrinth of his psyche. He thought back to what Chandler Parsons had just said. “See you man. I love you. Wait, I didn’t mean…” The phone call had ended only a few minutes prior, but it already seemed an eternity. He had not faltered…

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Tyler Hansbrough 18 Points Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

In honor of March Madness and the glorification of the ideal of Men’s college basketball, I present to you highlights of the player most representative of those ideals: Tyler Hansbrough. Tyler embodies many tenets of the NCAA system: toughness, leadership, coachability, sacrifice. Or something. He’s also white. Very white. These highflying black players, they don’t…

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Kentavious Caldwell-Pope 27 Points Full Highlights (3/22/2015)

Kentavious Caldwell-Pope stood at the free throw line, just as he had a million times before. “Remember your rhythm, Ken,” he thought to himself as the referee prepared to throw him the ball for his first attempt. “Your teammates are counting on you, and you know how Gunds gets when you miss!” Celtics and Pistons…

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