Oh man. Here’s some words of wisdom from your number one bro DownToBuck: even if your local pizza place (which also happens to be your favorite) is offering a really sick special price on any pizza (ANY PIZZA, NO GOTCHAS HERE), don’t give in to temptation and get the extra large. Or, if you do succumb to the cheesy succubus and get the extra large, don’t try to eat the whole thing in one sitting.
Whoof.
It was a tasty pizza, I’ll give it that. And it was cheap as hell. There was just too much of it.
I feel like I’m going to die. I mean, that’s what everyone feels like all the times because death is the natural outcome of life, but I feel it more immanently than ever before. Like, Death himself, clad in black robes, is standing over me with his big-ass scythe and saying “you shouldn’t have eaten that big-ass supreme pizza because now I have come for you”.
My stomach is making ungodly noises that I’ve never heard before. I can’t feel my arms. My vision is randomly blurring and refocusing. Is this what the end feels like?