“Okay,” Jon Leuer said to his teammate Darrun Hilliard as they munched on greasy pizza in the dining area of the Chuck E. Cheese’s. “No more screwing around. We have to find somewhere to pick up chicks.”
“But I haven’t even played the Skee-ball yet,” Darrun whined. “You know I’m going to get hella tickets outta that thing. Ticket to token ratio through the roof man. Through the roof.”
Jon looked at Darrun sympathetically. “I know man. I know. But we’re the Leu Crew. We have to be thugging it up and banging hoes. We’re doing neither right now.”
“I think it’s thug to get five hundreds in a row in Skee-ball,” Darrun replied petulantly.
Now Jon set down his pizza and said sternly, “Dude. When you’re in the Leu Crew, you’re in for life, no matter how bad it gets or how much you don’t want to do it. That’s what homies do for each other. We got each other’s backs.”
“You’re right,” Darrun conceded. “But I have no idea where we would go to find girls. I thought you would know since you’re the leader of the posse.”
Jon looked around at their fellow Chuck E. Cheese’s patrons to see if there were any suitable candidates for banging. Then he shook his head. “It can’t be here. All these chicks are fat and gross, plus they’re probably all single moms. I ain’t taking care of some other man’s kid. There’s nothing gangster about that at all.”
“Do you just…find chicks on the street? Like in the rap songs?” Darrun asked tentatively.
Shrugging his shoulders, Jon replied, “How would I know? The Leu Crew hasn’t rolled long enough on the streets to find out if those streets have chicks on them waiting to get picked up by two high-profile thug ballers.”
“So, what, we just drive around Detroit in your car and wait for chicks to appear?”
Again, Jon shook his head. “No. I got a better idea.”
—
“Man, how’d you find out about this? There’s chicks everywhere!” Darrun whispered in awe as the two tall men walked into the Parent-Teacher Association meeting.
“My mom used to go to these things all the time,” Jon whispered back. “It’s like MILF city here. So much fat MILF booty.”
“High five,” Darrun said, holding up his hand. After Jon had slapped it, he continued happily, “This is what the Leu Crew is all about, man.”
“Hell yeah,” Jon replied. “Thug life. There’s no way Marcus can make fun of us now.”