I’m thinking that for my J.J. Redick threeilation this year, I’m never going to use any commentators other than the Clippers guys. Last year, everybody complained that Ralph Lawler bellowing “BINGOOOOOO!” into his mic while making a mess in his slacks made for an annoying viewing experience, so imagine how annoying it would be if 90% of the video were comprised of such exclamations. Here’s a hint: it would be very, very annoying.
Your only hope to avoid such a terrible fate is that Redick somehow gets injured and doesn’t make enough three-pointers to qualify for a compilation of them at the end of the season. Given that Redick has generally been an ironman throughout his career due to his low-impact style of play, hopes for a naturally-occurring injury are fairly slim, so you might have to get creative. And when I say “creative”, I mean you have to booby-trap Redick’s front door so that when he opens it a plank of wood drops down and smacks him in the nards.
If nobody steps up to the plate to injure Redick in such a way, everybody will suffer. Just remember: “Bingo! BINGO! BINGOOOO! OHHH BINGOOOOO! BINGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”