When is Joe Harris going to score 20 points in the NBA? I’ve got the biggest case of blue balls ever right now, except instead of sexual frustration it’s Joe Harris never scoring 20 points frustration. I thought for sure he was gonna do it tonight, he had SO MUCH TIME to get the few…
Read MoreMonth: November 2017
Dewayne Dedmon Career High 19 Points Full Highlights (11/6/2017)
The good thing about making Dewayne Dedmon highlights is that he doesn’t have any real diehard fans, so I can say whatever I want about him. With the more popular players, it’s a real balancing act between what I really think (usually negative things) and what fans really think (usually positive things). I can’t call…
Read MoreJayson Tatum 21 Points Full Highlights (11/6/2017)
The team Jayson Tatum is on is too good. How is he supposed to live up to his full scoring potential if there are a bunch of other competent dudes on what should be his roster? Either the Celtics need to get very crappy, very quickly, or they need to trade Tatum to a team…
Read MoreDillon Brooks 13 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2017)
Dillon Brooks has screwed me up in two different ways. FIRST WAY HE SCREWED ME UP: I keep pronouncing Dillon as “Dill On” in my head even though it’s pronounced like Dylan (“Dill An”). SECOND WAY HE SCREWED ME UP: He scored nineteen in his NBA debut, throwing out of whack my proprietary algorithms for…
Read MoreIsaiah Taylor 14 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2017)
Is it fair to say that Isaiah Taylor is already a better player than Tyshawn Taylor ever was? For those of you who don’t remember, Tyshawn Taylor played two seasons for the Nets, 2012-13 and 2013-14. He averaged, like, three points per game and wasn’t very good so he just didn’t play in the league…
Read MoreDewayne Dedmon 15 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2017)
The Hawks’ signing of Dewayne “Judge Dedd” Dedmon made very little sense to me when it happened and it still doesn’t make much sense to me. The Hawks are clearly tanking, so there’s not any point in having a solid, low-scoring, low-upside bigman on your team. What’s he gonna do? Instill a winning culture with…
Read MoreJeff Teague 18 Points/12 Assists Full Highlights (11/5/2017)
There must be something wrong with the Minnesota commentators, because they went the entire game without saying anything like “Jeff Teague gives you something that Ricky didn’t,” or “That’s something Ricky Rubio could never really do.” Usually when Jeff Teague calmly walks up to the three-point line in transition and bombs a triple, one of…
Read MoreLuke Babbitt 17 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2017)
#babbersnation unite! The Hawks have found their Ersan Ilyasova replacement of the future, and his name is Luke Babbitt! The amount of confidence they are showing in him is astounding: “Hey you get the start tonight oh and why don’t you guard LeBron James while you play for all but seven minutes of the game?…
Read MoreDennis Schröder 28 Points/9 Assists Full Highlights (11/5/2017)
Dënniß ßchrööder kinda took over the game in the third quarter tonight. Derrick Rose couldn’t hold him at all, which is expected I guess. Jae Crowder couldn’t hold him either. No one could hold him. He was unholdable. The Rajon Rondo comparisons from earlier in his career should be pretty much invalidated by now. As…
Read MoreTyreke Evans 26 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2017)
I was thinking while making this vid about how hyped I would be if it was Jawun Evans scoring these 26 points instead of Tyreke Evans. Based on what I know about me, which is a lot, I’m pretty sure I would be inconsolably hyped. I don’t even really know who Jawun Evans is but…
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