Dennis Schroder rummaged through his duffel bag, looking for the last bit of equipment he would need to face the Jazz. Where was it? Pushing aside various red-colored armbands, headbands, anklebands, and bodybands, he found what he was really looking for. The Magic Lederhosen, bestowed to him by none other than Detlef Schrempf himself. He pulled them out, but something was different…
“Hey, John, come over here!” Dennis yelled to his teammate on the other side of the locker room. From across the room he could see John Collins tense up a little bit after hearing the call, hang his head, and begin to trudge over.
“Yeah?”
Dennis took the lederhosen and held them up to John’s face.
“Do these look any different to you? More… magical?”
John looked wary. “I thought you said I was unworthy to gaze upon your enchanted suspenders?”
“I never said that, you dolt. I said you were unworthy to TOUCH them. No one except true-blooded Germans can touch them. If an unworthy hand grazes them, the ghost of Detlef Schrempf comes and murders them. You wonder why we haven’t seen Kenneth Faried at all this season?”
“You didn’t tell me about that part.” John muttered.
“… but it’s totally fine for people to look at them. Even big-headed rookies like yourself. And, please, call them by their correct name.” Dennis continued without interruption.
“The bewitched trousers?” John replied, smirking.
“Just answer the question. Do the magic lederhosen or don’t the magic lederhosen look more magical than usual?”
John began walking away. “How am I supposed to know? They look normal to me, as normal as they always look, which isn’t very. Do you want me to call in my buddy? He’s a lederhosen expert. You might be able to get a second opinion.”
Dennis didn’t respond to this final taunt. Instead, he stared intensely at the garment in his hands. The longer he stared, the more it seemed to shimmer under the fluorescent lights. He thought he could feel the buckles shaking with unknown power. He held it up to his face. There was a noticeable buzzing.
“Yup, the Magic Lederhosen are definitely more magical than usual.” he announced to no one. A few of his teammates looked curiously at him, but he received no other response. “I’m totally going for 40 tonight.”