Collin Sexton 28 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/11/2019)

After the Cavaliers’ surprise win over the Raptors, led by a 28/5 statline from Collin Sexton that falls into the “actually good statline” category, I have taken the liberty of tabulating a list of people associated with the Raptors and their emotional state right now.

kyLe LLLLLory: in shambles
Kahi LLLLLLeonard: Plotting with uncLe on how to get to the Clippers without making all of Canada mad at him (considering faking another injury and then alleging that the Raptors mismanaged his recovery)
PascaL Siakam: butthurt
DeMar DeRozan: snickering to himself
Nick Nurse: watching game film in his tighty whities while eating a whole pint of ice cream and making the ballboys who come in to bring him more ice cream uncomfortable with vaguely sexual innuendo
The people of Canada: too mad to think straight
Serge Ibaka: Sitting in a jail cell thinking about punching his cellmates
Marc GasoL: Wondering where his personal ice cream stash went

Meanwhile, I totally bet the Cavaliers went to Dave & Buster’s to play arcade games and drink tons of wine in celebration of Sexton’s emergence as a not-terrible player.

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