Alfonzo McKinnie 12 Points Full Highlights (5/20/2019)

If the Warriors can win a playoff game while starting both Alfonzo McKinnie (who is just a guy) and Jordan Bell (known candle fetishist), what hope does a potential Finals opponent have once Kevin Durant and Demarcus Cousins come back? I almost don’t want the Bucks to make the Finals; the pain of loss would be too much for my fragile heart to handle. The only hope is that Durant’s injury is more serious than the team is letting on, and that Cousins comes back and implodes the whole thing because of his horrible me-first diva attitude and unwillingness to play the style that the Warriors have recently rediscovered.

That’s the great thing about players like McKinnie: they’ll do literally ANYTHING that they’re told to. They can’t afford not to, lest they find themselves out of the league. You don’t have to worry about them not playing the right way. You do have to worry about them sucking and not making shots, so it’s a tradeoff. But there’s no ball stopping with McKinnie. There’s no lack of defensive effort. There’s no sulking when he doesn’t get the ball.

I’m assuming all these things, of course. Warriors fans can stroll over to the comments and chime in if they want to tell me that McKinnie actually does all those bad things and more. If they do that, however, I will have to have them prove to me that they are actual Warriors fans by telling me who the 10th assist of Stephen Curry’s first career triple-double went to. Any real Warriors fans should know this. I don’t want clowns pretending to be Warriors fans telling me lies about McKinnie.

McKinnie provided just enough offense to give the Warriors the win in this one. In an overtime game like this, every bucket counts, and he made 5 of them. His rebound putback with a minute and a half left in the overtime to give his team a one-point lead was mega clutch and definitely worthy of a 30-second segment in the Warriors’ upcoming championship DVD.

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