This is what happens, people with man-buns/other weird long-hair creations. Take note. You pull that stuff back too tight, and guess what? You go bald. If you saw Evan Fournier a couple years ago, he had some weird topknot thingie where the hair at the front was being pulled tight all the way back. It…
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Zach Randolph 29 Points Full Highlights (2/22/2018)
You know how hard it is to make highlights when every single play-by-play source stops midway through the third quarter? It’s frickin’ hard. I hope I got all of Zach Randolph’s buckets, because I was like a blind man in a mirror maze trying to find them. Some people think that highlight-makers actually watch the…
Read MoreBen Simmons Career High 32 Points/11 Assists Full Highlights (2/22/2018)
BEN SIMMONS JUMPSHOT ALERT! BEN SIMMONS JUMPSHOT ALERT! Forget about the career-high, forget about the game-winning free throws, forget about all his sick passes and sicker finishes, Ben Simmons just hit a legit pullup midrange jumper. I installed a whole bunch of flashing red klaxons in my highlights cave that tell me when he hits…
Read MoreDavid Nwaba Career High 21 Points Full Highlights (2/22/2018)
David Nwaba is one of those shooting guards who has the “guard” part down pat but struggles with the “shooting” part. He can defend, rebound, finish at the rim, plus all the little things, but shooting from outside? Nah. 3-and-D without the 3. Until tonight. Before this explosion, he had made a total of 6…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 17 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (2/22/2018)
Wizards fans can claim all they want that their team is better with John Wall at the helm, but I know the truth and I’m going to share it with you right now: they aren’t. Boom. Truth bomb deployed. I don’t need to justify this fact, because everyone watching this vid is a diehard Tomas…
Read MoreBobby Portis Career High 38 Points Full Highlights (2/22/2018)
Big congratulations to Bobby Portis for not only demolishing his career-high by scoring 38 points against Joel Embaby and the 76ers, but also setting a new career-low in teammates punched, with 0. That’s right: he went the whole game, the WHOLE GAME, without ever turning to a fellow Bull, saying “I’m going to punch you…
Read MoreDante Cunningham 22 Points Full Highlights (2/22/2018)
How long ago was it when Dante Cunningham scored this many points? I’m thinking back, way back, and I can’t remember when he last scored 20. I’m not going to check now, since all my frickin’ old vids got deleted and that’s like the easiest way to check god damn it, so we’re just going…
Read MoreTrey Burke 26 Points Full Highlights (2/22/2018)
What better way to start the resurrection of my channel than to depict a player starting the resurrection of his career? I was sure that Trey “Treyburkulosis” Burke was going to be over in Euro-land for at least a few seasons when he washed out of the league after his rookie deal. I was wrong!…
Read MoreTaj Gibson Career High 28 Points Full Highlights (2/15/2018)
Karl-Anthony Towns meekly approached his teammate Taj Gibson in the locker room, wordlessly holding out an envelope in front of him. Taj looked at Karl-Anthony coldly. “Whatever that is, I don’t want it.” Karl-Anthony held the envelope out further, but when Taj still didn’t take it, he slipped it inside Taj’s gym bag. “It’s an…
Read MoreJulius Randle 23 Points Full Highlights (2/15/2018)
I was told, repeatedly, that Julius Randle was going to be traded. Yet the trade deadline is long past, and Randle is still in a Lakers uniform? If the Lakers hated him so much (as also has been claimed repeatedly), why didn’t they take a second-round pick for him and move on with their rebuild?…
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