How long until Kelly Oubre’s “do pushups every time I end up on the floor” shtick becomes played out? Or is it already played out? Perhaps I’m turning into a grumpy old man, perhaps I’ve always been a grumpy old man trapped in a young man’s body. Suns fans seem to like it still, but…
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Kelly Oubre 23 Points Full Highlights (10/25/2019)
All the happiness and fun caused by the Suns dominant opening-night win against the Kings is gone now. I warned Suns fans not to get too excited, and I was right to warn them, but I didn’t expect how this would all play out. I just sorta figured that they would regress back to their…
Read MoreKelly Oubre 21 Points/3 Dunks Full Highlights (10/23/2019)
I would urge Suns fans not to get overexcited about this decisive win over the Kings. I don’t remember the reactions, but I do remember how they creamed the Mavericks on opening night last year, then proceeded to suck as hard (or harder) as any team in recent memory. It’s easy to become hyped due…
Read MoreKelly Oubre All 70 Dunks Full Highlights (2018-19 Season Dunkilation)
Staring in frustration at the empty pad of paper in front of him, Kelly Oubre wondered why he had completely failed to brainstorm any ideas for his struggling web series, Wave Papi’s Man-Overs. The first few episodes had been modest successes, but only because of his own status as a professional athlete. His reach into…
Read MoreKelly Oubre 32 Points Full Highlights (3/16/2019)
“Yo Kelly, what’s up with all the iPhones pointed-” “CUT! CUT!” Kelly yelled in exasperation, interrupting his monologue to glare at Tyler Johnson, who had just walked into his impromptu video production studio that was set up in the bathroom of the visitor’s locker room. “You absolute idiot. Can you not see that I’m in…
Read MoreKelly Oubre 22 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2019)
Kelly Oubre carefully placed the fourth of four iPhones on a tripod pointed at a spot in front of the locker-room mirror. The other three iPhones were also on tripods and varying distances from the apparent focus of the shot, a stool sitting in front of the mirror. “Hey Richaun, come over here and make…
Read MoreKelly Oubre 22 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2019)
After squandering their lead in their last matchup against the Warriors, the Suns have now beaten the Warriors fair and square on their home turf. While bandwagon fans who paid $2,000 per ticket (not to mention $30 for an oversalted “bay area chicken tenders platter”) streamed for the exits, unable to believe that their beloved…
Read MoreKelly Oubre 27 Points Full Highlights (3/4/2019)
The Suns are now the first team to beat the Bucks twice this season, and also the team to give them their first losing streak of the season. There are a lot of factors at play here, but one of the main ones is that Kelly Oubre just played with more energy than then entire…
Read MoreKelly Oubre 23 Points Full Highlights (2/21/2019)
Now that the epic Kelly Oubre Jr. vs Klay Thompson storyline which spanned twenty videos has come to an end (you can find the thrilling conclusion to the story here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPYZpwSpKmA), I have no idea what to write about this guy. Theoretically I could comment on his improved play, or which star players past and…
Read MoreKelly Oubre 28 Points/2 Poster Dunks Full Highlights (2/13/2019)
I was perfectly happy with what Kelly Oubre was doing on the Suns, but I guess I shouldn’t have (note: shouldn’t’ve is apparently, not acceptable English according to the grand arbiters of spellcheck) been, because he’s been way more exciting in Phoenix. All that was needed to unlock this excitement was a bad team, though…
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