At some point, I saw a disturbing stat: DJ Augustin leads the league in dribbles per touch. I can’t remember how many dribbles per touch he actually had, but we’re going to with 30. Possibly 40. You think of all the ISO-heavy players in the league, the ones who want to make sure they know…
Read MoreTag: Orlando Magic
Khem Birch 12 Points Full Highlights (8/11/2020)
Khem Birch’s name just lends itself way too easily to nicknames. Both his first name and his last name are flexible enough that I could spend days just coming up with new hilarious nicknames and I would never get to a point where I was like, “Ope, that’s it, I can’t think of any more…
Read MoreWes Iwundu 18 Points Full Highlights (8/11/2020)
I was all set to put the words “career high” in the title of this video, words that would surely drive hundreds of thousands, possibly millions, of views to it, but then I actually looked up Wes Iwundu’s, career high and it’s not eighteen points. It’s nineteen points. And he did that in January of…
Read MoreMarkelle Fultz 18 Points Full Highlights (8/11/2020)
Markelle “Fultz Flag Operation” Fultz maybe isn’t quite a starting-level point guard in this league, but the Magic aren’t quite a “starting-level” team in this league so I see no reason why they can’t start him as they go from The Bubb Regular Season to the Bubb Playoffs. I mean, nobody’s going to be sad…
Read MoreGary Clark 15 Points/2 Blocks Full Highlights (8/9/2020)
Whenever I think of Gary Clark, I always think of the massed hordes of Rockets fans who were convinced that he was going to be some kind of game-changing stud right out of the gate for their team. The amount of verbal fellation that they lavished upon Daryl Morey for having the foresight to acquire…
Read MoreMarkelle Fultz 16 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (8/9/2020)
The Orlando Magic should be doing way better than they are in the NBA Bubble. Every game is like a home game for them. Everyone knows about the advantages that the Nuggets have when playing at home, but the Magic have those same sorts of advantages. They know how to deal with playing at sea…
Read MoreTerrence Ross 25 Points Full Highlights (8/2/2020)
In my giddiness over the fact that the NBA season actually resumed successfully, despite the utter lack of normalcy outside of the bubble, I forgot about one thing: My absolute burning hatred for free throws. You’d think that, in four months where the only administrative tasks set before the NBA were which teams get to…
Read MoreKhem Birch 12 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (7/31/2020)
Hate to say it folks, but this vid just sucks. I was hoping to try and avoid making blatantly awful videos for the restart, but here we are, on only the second day, and I’ve gone and done it. I’m sorry. All I wanted was for people to be enriched by a Khem Birch highlight…
Read MoreJonathan Isaac 16 Points Full Highlights (7/31/2020)
One of the underrated things about COVID-19 is that it has the potential to turn season-ending injuries into non-season-ending injuries. A miracle of modern medicine! You thought Kevin Durant was done? Faugh! With so many extra months to rehab, there’d be no way he wouldn’t want to return and lead the Nets to… Actually since…
Read MoreMarkelle Fultz All 87 Midrange Jumpers Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Jumperilation)
Markelle Fultz looked down at his hands. They were bloody. That was to be expected after one had committed acts which Markelle had just committed. He wiped his hands on his pants, leaving bloody streaks which would have plainly implicated him in the deed, were anybody around to do the implication. Slipping out of the…
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