Tomas Satoransky is coming off his worst game of the season, a sweet 0-for-8 with 1 assist and 3 turnovers performance that was probably the sole reason for the Bulls losing that game. I was kind of thinking after that game, “wow, Sato has been a disappointment this year, I wonder what’s wrong with him”….
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Tomas Satoransky 19 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (2/11/2020)
The average American knows nothing about Czechia or the Czech people. Most wouldn’t be able to point it out on a map. Most probably wouldn’t even come close to pointing at the right part of the map. Even the fact that the Czech Republic got renamed to Czechia, like, four years ago is probably lost…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 19 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (1/25/2020)
DownToBuck ate some funny shrimp for lunch and isn’t feeling too well right now, so he’s going to phone in this description by utilizing the tried-and-true “power ranking” format. If the low-effort nature of this video description bothers you, I direct you to the description for tonight’s Shabazz Napier triple-double, which had a very high-effort…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 11 Points/Career High 14 Assists Full Highlights (1/6/2020)
While making this video, I was getting the feeling that some of these assists given to Tomas Satoransky weren’t quite legitimate. In the interest of truthfulness and accuracy, I will go through each assist one-by-one to determine whether or not the assist should have been awarded. Assist 1 (Zach LaVine): Legit bounce pass right into…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 20 Points Full Highlights (12/23/2019)
“Sato, why do you look so down?” Tomas Satoransky realized that he had paused halfway through taking off his shoe, being too lost in thought to continue his postgame routine. Did his facial expression really make his sadness that obvious? “Oh, just homesick I guess,” he said, putting a smile on his face even though…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 17 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (12/18/2019)
What would it take to get Tomas Satoransky to be more aggressive? Alteratively, what would it take to get Zach LaVine to be less aggressive? For the second one, I’m thinking “multi-limb amputation”, and for the first one, “tell him that Zach LaVine got into an accident with a farming implement”. But there’s got to…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 19 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (11/27/2019)
I don’t know if I’m just a moron or unobservant or what, but I completely didn’t realize that Tomas “Czech Your Privilege” Satoransky is averaging career-highs in points and assists this season. My assumption was that since the Bulls are kinda playing like a big pile of booty and have been playing like booty for…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky Career High 27 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (11/6/2019)
Wait a minute, this is Tomas Satoransky’s career high? It may seem obvious to you now (because I put “Career High” in the title of this video, otherwise you wouldn’t know either, don’t lie), but that fact is seriously surprising to me. This isn’t some scrub or some rookie that we’re talking about here. This…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 16 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
Tomas “Czech Your Privilege” Satoransky just keeps having these good games. He’s having good games so regularly that I am forced to come to the conclusion that he is actually a good player, and not just an average player punching above his weight due to a sudden abundance of playing time. This is his ninth…
Read MoreTomas Satoransky 17 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (3/11/2019)
Ever since John Wall got injured, I’ve been trying to figure out what the Wizards’ long-term plans are. Since plans for the team as a whole are completely opaque to me at this point (playoffs? tanking? neither? both?), I’m mostly just thinking about their plans at the point guard position since that’s easier for me…
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