If you were Mike Conley, and it was a Sunday morning, and you were going to get breakfast from McDonalds, what would you get? Keep in mind that Mike Conley, for the purposes of this exercise, has infinity money.
First off, any sandwich with egg on it is absolutely out of the question. Egg is disgusting. Egg is for little children with undeveloped palates. Mike Conley definitely does not like eggs.
Also, forget those breakfast platters they have. Conley prefers finer-grained control over the components of his breakfast.
Their cinna-melts are pretty good. It’s like a cinnamon roll and monkey bread combined. Conley has a weak spot for cinnamon. Better order two of ’em. And an orange juice – coffee is for wimps who need caffeine to wake themselves up in the morning. Conley is not a wimp.
The dollar menu is pretty good. Hashbrowns? Sign him up for two of those as well. Those fried potato patties are like crack in a little paper envelope. Sausage and cheese muffin? Salty, greasy, and perfect for making highlight vi- I mean, perfect for that pre-shootaround energy boost. Anything with sausage on it is something that Conley would like. That means a sausage biscuit too. Classic simplicity: fluffy biscuit, meaty sausage disc, not dressed up all fancy with egg and cheese and other excessive fripperies. Like something his momma used to make when he was little.
Okay, I think we got it figured out. I hope Conley enjoys his breakfast.