Who else was getting a little worried about Kyle Korver? Don’t be ashamed. We’re all a little bit guilty. It’s hard to root against players like Kyle, so when he started the season 5-of-20 from the threezone, I found that, for the first time in my life, I didn’t resent him for being a stunning, muscular clone of noted Hollywood hunk Ashton Kutcher. In fact, all I felt was pity. Pity and embarrassment. I came to realize that not everything in life revolves around how perfect your hair is or how you steal girlfriends from less-attractive people just by having eyes which are easy to get lost in yet impossible to escape from. Even if you have those things, you also have to be successful at what you love doing. And Kyle Korver was not being successful at shooting threes.
Then I remembered how he has stolen multiple girlfriends away from me and I went back to hating him. I hate you Kyle Korver. I hope she’s making you pay child support right now.