Devin Booker trudged aimlessly through a vast expanse of featureless Arizona desert. There was little to distract his troubled mind; the looming mountains on the horizon, the intermittent squawks of vultures, occasional human-shaped cacti. He had not seen a real human for days, maybe weeks. He could feel his sanity slipping away, like sand through his cracked fingers.
So when he heard faint cries, he passed it off as another hallucination. But as he continued walking, they became clearer, and they sounded familiar.
“Help! Help! I can hear you pounding the parched earth with your thundering footsteps! Please, I’ve been stuck down here for almost a month! Deliver me, kind stranger!”
As Devin walked over a ridge towards the source of the commotion, a strange sight greeted him: a gigantic hole extending deep into the sand, perfectly circular, located in a small valley. Was this where the voice had come from? As fast as his aching legs could take him, he clambered down to the edge, briefly wondering what would happen if he fell in.
“Hello?” he yelled downward. The hole might as well have gone all the way to the center of the earth; he could not see anything except blackness at the bottom.
“Hello? Devin, is that you I hear? Devin! I know that’s you, your beautiful voice is like a symphony to my ears! Get me out of here!”
Laying down on his stomach, Devin maneuvered himself over the edge of the hole. Straining his eyes, he could now make out the faint silhouette of Markieff Morris, waving his arms frantically.
“What happened? What has prompted you to make friends with the bedrock?”
“It’s a slump Devin, the most massive one I’ve ever seen! I fell in Devin, I tumbled down in my haste to prove my worth, and now I fear I will be trapped in this slump forever, forever and ever, my bones shall remain undiscovered after I inevitably pass from this existence!
Devin stood up. “I’m sorry Markieff, but I cannot help you! I am too busy wandering the bleak desert of my rookie season, and am in no position to aid you in your plight! However, I wish you the best, and have confidence that you will, in time, find it within your heart to climb out of the slump which you unwittingly call home! Good bye, friend!”
He continued walking, leaving Markieff’s now panicked pleas behind. There was a lot of desert left to wander.