Relaxing in his condo after another tough workout, Andrew Wiggins felt himself drifting away once again. He sighed, knowing what was to come, but powerless to stop it. He closed his eyes and let the blackness overtake him. He came to in a familiar place. An industrial-looking training facility in a nondescript inner-city warehouse, seemingly…
Read MoreMonth: November 2015
Allen Crabbe Career High 15 Points Full Highlights (11/8/2015)
Today’s assignment: Reread the entirety of the “Harry Potter” series, replacing in your mind any instances of the character Vincent Crabbe with NBA player Allen Crabbe. That part in book two where Crabbe and Goyle get roofied with cupcakes and other treats in order for their DNA to be forcefully extracted from them? Allen Crabbe…
Read MoreMeyers Leonard 17 Points Full Highlights (11/8/2015)
It’s just perfect that as soon as the Blazers’ front office finally shows some confidence in Meyers Leonard, he starts playing poorly. He’s picked it up a little bit since his awful start, but 6-of-26 from three for Mr. 50-40-90 is still pretty garbage. Like, Greivis Vasquez level garbage. That’s not good. He also has…
Read MoreReggie Jackson Career High 40 Points Full Highlights (11/8/2015)
I knew while compiling this vid that I was gonna get beat by DawkIns (and GD, may he rest in peace, oh wait he’s back again) by a mile on upload time. He has his methods, I have mine, and mine mean that I can never be first to provide highlights of the sick (or…
Read MoreT.J. Warren 17 Points Full Highlights (11/8/2015)
T.J. Warren vs T.J. McConnell: who is the best T.J. in the NBA? Warren was a sick scorer in college and was expected to do good on the NBA level. McConnell was not that sick of a scorer in college, and was not expected to make the league at all. Winner: Warren McConnell is white,…
Read MoreEnes Kanter 21 Points Full Highlights (11/8/2015)
Enes Kanter fidgeted with the silverware in front of him. His date was late, and even though she had seemed very eager to meet him, Enes himself was not as enthused about the entire operation. He would not have been entirely displeased if he had gotten ditched; that possibility presented a much slimmer chance of…
Read MoreJerryd Bayless 19 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (11/7/2015)
I’m currently in the process of trying to figure out what the Nets organization did to Jerryd Bayless to make him hate them so much. Whatever it was, it must have been really grievous, because Jerryd wants nothing more than to take a big dump on their team whenever he can. First it was 26…
Read MoreIsaiah Canaan 23 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (11/7/2015)
Once you come to grips with the fact that Isaiah Canaan is not a point guard and should never ever be played at that position ever (EVER!), you realize that he’s not that bad of a player. He’s like a slightly less swaggy Lou Williams. If you like guys like that, first of all I…
Read MoreMario Hezonja 11 Points Full Highlights (11/7/2015)
Mario Hezonja is the perfect role model for teens who need somebody to look up to. I’m not talking about Croatian teens, although I guess they could look up to him too if they really wanted. What I’m talking about here is kids with bad acne. Hezonja is proof positive that even if you have…
Read MoreEric Gordon 21 Points Full Highlights (11/7/2015)
Why can’t the Pelicans win a game? They’re 0-6 right now even with Anthony Davis beasting. Here’s a list I came up with which is entitled “DTB’s List of Reasons Why the Pelicans Can’t Win a Game”: -Tyreke Evans is trapped under a mountain of beads on Bourbon Street -Anthony Davis shoots too many threes…
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