This video which you are about to subject yourself to might be my most egregiously non-highlight output to date. Out of the 29 separate clips which comprise the video, only four of them show Spencer “Din-Dins” Dinwiddie in the act of scoring a field goal. That’s a horrible ratio that sends the video from “moderately entertaining” (because who wouldn’t want to watch an 80’s looking point guard drop 21 and 8?) to “life-threateningly unwatchable”. That’s right. I fully expect this video to kill or severely injure at least one viewer. Tomorrow I’ll open up my favorite online news website and see the terrible headline: “Man Killed Watching NBA Highlight Video”.
The field goal to free throw ratio found here is 4-to-11. It would have been an even 3-to-1 if Din-Dins could have made one more free throw. But even this lesser ratio is still way too large. It’s the sort of ratio that should fill you with dread just reading about it. The more I type these words the more I realize that this abomination of a video should never have been brought into the world. I should have killed this demonic creation at its birth; instead, I unleashed it upon the internet at large.
I’m sorry.