Who is this third dude that the Nuggets added to the commentary crew? I don’t know if I like him or not, I haven’t had enough time to judge, but don’t the suits in charge realize that three-person boxes never ever work? Ever? I swear Chris Marlowe sounds half-angry every time he’s finally allowed to…
Read MoreMonth: October 2018
Nikola Jokic 23 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (10/21/2018)
It’s only three games into the season, but the Warriors are looking really beatable. At this point, they’ve earned the right to coast in the regular season, but it’s not like they want to lose. They want to win, every pro athlete does. And they couldn’t do it. Because the Denver Nuggets were too good….
Read MoreKent Bazemore 23 Points Full Highlights (10/21/2018)
Kent Bazemore is the last remnant of that Hawks team that won 60 games half a decade ago. How time flies! It seems like just yesterday their whole starting lineup was in the All-Star game, even Kyle Korver who wasn’t that good really. Bazemore didn’t play a very big role back then, and the end…
Read MoreIman Shumpert 26 Points Full Highlights (10/21/2018)
Iman Shumpert has already matched his “2017-18 DTB Videos” total from last year with this unexpected performance. “Unexpected” is probably putting it lightly, at least for me; I really thought we’d seen the last of him doing anything of note in the NBA. He played one game in the 2018 part of last season. Just…
Read MoreOmari Spellman 17 Points/4 Threes Full Highlights (10/21/2018)
Omari Spellman’s listed weight is 245 pounds. Watch this video, and tell me if you think the dude depicted within weighs 245 pounds. No way. Even the thumbnail image gives his true girth away. He’s gotta be pushing 300, and I’m only exaggerating a little bit. He’s what the teenagers call “T H I C…
Read MoreTrae Young 35 Points/11 Assists Full Highlights (10/21/2018)
As Trae Young peeled off his jersey, he heard a shrill burst of laughter come from above him. However, when he looked up, there was nothing on top of his locker that could have caused the noise, other than maybe a hidden prank device of some kind. Next, he looked to the side, where Jeremy…
Read MoreDwight Powell 19 Points Full Highlights (10/20/2018)
Dwight Powell AKA Dwight Power is currently leading the league in field goal percentage at a robust 80%. That obviously won’t continue, because no high-volume player has ever shot 80% from the field (even 70% is exceedingly rare), but I’m sure his FG% will remain high due to the continued excision of the jumpshot from…
Read MoreAllonzo Trier 15 Points Full Highlights (10/20/2018)
Okay. So now we know that the fifteen points Allonzo Trier scored in his rookie debut were not a fluke. A fluke would not happen twice. That would contradict the very definition of a “fluke”. We can say with relative certainty that Trier is a player who is easily capable of scoring fifteen non-flukey points…
Read MoreCameron Payne 17 Points Full Highlights (10/20/2018)
The bad news for Chicago Bulls fans is that their team is going to be bad this year. The good news is that Jerian Grant isn’t around anymore so they don’t have to worry about whether they hate him or Cameron Payne more for being totally incapable of running a functioning NBA offense. Now the…
Read MoreJoe Harris 19 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (10/20/2018)
I gotta be honest, from one bro to another bro: Joe Harris, your beard looks like trash. You look like that part of Anchorman were a fallen-from-grace Ron Burgundy has become a hobo, except you don’t have droplets of milk in your beard. I understand that it’s petty to rag on NBA players about their…
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