I don’t really understand how Marcus Smart fits in with this iteration of the Celtics, but as long as he continues to torment Celtics fans with his outsized contract and streaky play, I guess I’m fine with him remaining a Celtic. He was re-signed in the off season to be, I assume, the primary backup…
Read MoreMonth: November 2018
Derrick Rose 22 Points Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
If I had known that Derrick Rose, he of the multiple knee surgeries, was going to average nearly twenty points per game at age thirty (remember, he’s had multiple knee surgeries, his knee tendons were actually replaced with extra-thick rubber bands), I would have had to think long and hard about his OFFICIAL DTB EXCLUSION…
Read MoreBuddy Hield 28 Points Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
When we got into the zoo, I reminded my 12-foot-tall 3D-printed purple plastic sentient naked statue of Buddy Hield that we had to be really, really careful. I told him that the people who run the zoo don’t like it if people come in after it’s closed for the night, even if they don’t intend…
Read MoreDavis Bertans 17 Points Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
I want to send out a sincere thanks to Gregg Popovich for not playing Davis Bertans as much as he deserved. I don’t agree with the decision to not play him more than the 23 minutes he did get, but it really benefited the Bucks and led to their victory tonight. Bertans’ first stint in…
Read MoreJulius Randle 29 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
It would’ve gone unnoticed by most people, but I want to let the world know that the ‘Zards ROBBED us of a sick matchup tonight. No, not Dwight Howard versus Anthony Davis. That would’ve been cool, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. I’m talking about Julius “Orange” Randle versus Chasson “Press X To…
Read MoreEric Gordon 28 Points Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
I knew Eric Gordon was struggling, but damn. No one informed me about the extent of his struggles. Get this: prior to tonight, 24 percent three-point shooting on 8 attempts per game. 32 percent from the field overall; he’s not shooting twos much better than threes. Everyone’s been blaming all sorts of stuff for the…
Read MoreNikola Mirotic 24 Points Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
The NBA seemed a lot more fun when Nikola Mirotic was one of its leading scorers. He’s still sorta up there, hovering around 35th in the league in points per game, but that’s wimpy compared to… was he first? After those first two games where he dropped 30 and 36? Man, I was having so…
Read MoreJamal Murray 22 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
A very Jokic-esque statline for Jamal Murray tonight: 22 points, 8 rebounds, 8 assists. Except for the whole points part. Nowadays Jokic would never score that many, he’s too busy doing his thing to bother with the buckets part of the game. I’m still feeling residual hype from Murray’s 48-point game, but reserves are running…
Read MoreMarvin Bagley 20 Points Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
Man, how sweet would it have been for Marvin Bagley to tip in the game-winner at the buzzer for a win over the Larriors. That would’ve been the thing his defenders could point to when future people accused him of being a bust. “A bust? You sure about that? Because I have in my possession…
Read MoreOtto Porter 29 Points Full Highlights (11/24/2018)
OFFICIAL PLAYERS WHOSE FIRST NAMES ARE PALINDROMES POWER RANKINGS 1. J.J. Redick 2. Otto Porter 3. J.J. Barea PAG REWOP 442. Kendavious Caldwell-Pope Whoops, sorry, didn’t realize that there really weren’t that many players whose names could be spelled the same way backward as forward. I thought there were gonna be, like, 20 names on…
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