Shabazz Napier opened his eyes, and when he saw what was waiting for him beyond his newly-opened eyelids, his immediate thought was that his physical safety was in danger. He was sitting by himself in the booth of a ratty, dirty fast-food restaurant. Wherever it was, it was not in a good part of the…
Read MoreAuthor: downtobuck
Seth Curry 19 Points Full Highlights (1/25/2020)
Seth Curry has now scored 466 points through 43 games. If he continues at that pace, he should score roughly 889 points for the season (assuming that he has 39 games left to play – I’m not going to check that math because I’m lazy). Meanwhile, the so-called “superior” brother, Steph Curry, has just 81…
Read MoreDarius Bazley 15 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (1/25/2020)
After Darius Bazley scored eighteen points near the start of the season, I undertook the ritual that would cosmically transfer the “Bazed God” nickname from Kent Bazemore to Darius Bazley. However, Bazley completely failed to live up to the “Bazed God” nickname in the subsequent months, so I reversed the ritual and re-assigned the nickname…
Read MoreJarrett Allen 20 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (1/25/2020)
Since the arrival of Kyrie Irving on the Nets has drastically reduced the funness of the entire Brooklyn Nets team, I was thinking about ways they could increase their funness while not having to make any moves that blatantly trade away talented players (like Irving). Moving Spencer Dinwiddie to the bench was a step in…
Read MoreSviatoslav Mykhailiuk 19 Points Full Highlights (1/25/2020)
Sviatoslav Mykhailiuk has been the starter for the Pistons ever since Luke Kennard went out with some kind of injury (my guess is that he’s off in Europe undergoing an experimental new type of hairline restoration surgery that’s not approved for American patients yet). However, it was only recently that Mykhailiuk started PLAYING like an…
Read MoreMarvin Williams 18 Points Full Highlights (1/24/2020)
OFFICIAL DTB REMINDER: Even though Marvin Williams has had a long and successful career (at least from a collecting checks perspective, maybe not a “winning” perspective), he is still a big ol’ bust. Like most tweeners ever drafted at the top of the draft, he never lived up to the pre-draft visions of a long,…
Read MoreJosh Okogie 17 Points Full Highlights (1/24/2020)
Until Giannis Adetokunbo (note the authentic spelling) mans up and embraces his Nigerian heritage, Josh Okogie is Nigeria’s best hope for an NBA superstar. What, you think Al-Farouq Aminu is the better choice? I’d rather have Ime Udoka than him. Current Udoka, mind you. And what’s Solomon Alabi up to these days, anyway? I’d take…
Read MoreTorrey Craig 15 Points Full Highlights (1/24/2020)
Zion Williamson nuthuggers aren’t going to like hearing it, but Torrey Craig COMPLETELY and BRUTALLY outplayed Mr. No Knees last night. Craig, who I think played Div II college basketball at some random school that nobody’s ever heard of, and who was never even close to being anointed as the next LeBron James, scored the…
Read MoreDaniel Theis 16 Points Full Highlights (1/24/2020)
Daniel “Theis Theis Baby” Theis has been good enough for the Celtics that the usual calls for them to trade for a center at the deadline have been muted. At least, that’s my impression of things. Maybe there are crowds of Celtics fans who are tired of his low-usage efficiency and are clamoring for the…
Read MoreGlenn Robinson III 18 Points Full Highlights (1/24/2020)
I get the feeling that the Warriors have their own little version of “The Process” going on right now where they know they’re not going to be competitive, so they’re just trying to figure out if any of the guys on their roster are worth keeping around when they presumably return to title contention next…
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