I prowl the dark streets of Denver, searching for the perfect target. The cans of spray paint rattle lightly in my backpack, cushioned by old t-shirts but still too loud for my taste. It’s three o’clock in the morning, and I’m unlikely to encounter another person, but I’m still on edge. Finally, I find a…
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Jamal Murray 31 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
I was getting myself ready to rake in the views for this video by putting “Career High” in the title. Imagine my disappointment when I found out that Jamal Murray scored 32 points earlier this year, thus ruining my perfectly laid-out plan for the success of this video! Now I don’t know what I’m going…
Read MoreDenzel Valentine 18 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
Is it just me (it never is, but isn’t that a great way to start a description?), or has Denzel Valentine changed his shooting form to be more of a throw than a shot? At 1:35 he totally throws the ball in from the three-point line, like he’s my dad or something. The rest of…
Read MoreWillie Cauley-Stein 22 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
I’m done trying to figure out Willie Cauley-Stein. I’ll leave the analysis of his value as a basketball player to Kings fans, who are already way more invested in him than I am, and sit back and enjoy the good games that he produces 1 out of every 8 tries or so. That way, I…
Read MoreSindarius Thornwell 13 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
Sindarius Thornwell seems to be suffering from Fryeitis, the disorder where one’s dominant foot edges forward over the three-point line all the time, resulting in a significant reduction in point output. Named after Channing Frye, the symptoms of the disorder are only cured by purposely standing at least a foot behind the line. The disorder…
Read MoreKyle Kuzma 30 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
Kyle “Clarence Withers” Kuzma is the steal of this year’s draft. No doubt about it now. With this performance he is leading all 2017 draftees in points per game at nearly 16. I admit, I didn’t believe the insane rabid-Lakers-fanbase-fueled hype after his great Summer League. Tons of dudes do good in Summer League. Jerryd…
Read MoreSpencer Dinwiddie Career High 25 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
At some point, without anyone noticing, Spencer Dinwiddie became one of the better backup PGs in the league. I admit, after his stint with Detroit ended, I thought he was done as an NBA player. Dudes who shoot way under 40 percent and then depart the team that drafted them are not usually long for…
Read MoreJustin Holiday 27 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
We’re a pretty decent chunk into the season and Justin Holiday is maintaining the slimmest of leads over his brother in the “Holiday bros PPG battle”. Before tonight he was losing 14.4 to 14.3 vs Jrue, but these 27 points should put him over the top because Jrue really sucks now and doesn’t usually score…
Read MoreKris Dunn Career High 22 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
This is it. This is the career-defining performance for Kris Dunn. If he ends up being a perpetual All-Star, we will be able to pinpoint the start of his ascent to this very moment. And if he kinda sucks for the rest of his career, we can say that this game at least made it…
Read MoreRaul Neto Career High 22 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2017)
Not only is this a career-high performance for Raul Neto, this is REALLY a career-high performance for Raul Neto. He smashed his old high-water mark of 15, smashed it like a big Brazilian booty, scoring 22 in the absence of Ricky Rubio. I’m looking at Neto right now, and I’m thinking “do the Jizz even…
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