Cristiano “The Brazilian Shaq” Felicio: ready for more minutes? He was relatively effective against the Knicks, playing 25 minutes and scoring thirteen points. He only grabbed five rebounds (I bet Taj Gibson was stealing his rebounds) but he didn’t accumulate any of the “bad” stats (turnovers or personal fouls). I thought conditioning might be an…
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Denzel Valentine 19 Points Full Highlights (1/10/2017)
Well, this was unexpected. Denzel Valentine has not been good at basketballing so far this year. That’s an understatement, but I’m not going to tell you how much of an understatement it is. If you’re a Bulls fan, you already know, and you’re breathing the hugest sigh of relief ever right now. If you’re not…
Read MoreMichael Carter-Williams 15 Points Full Highlights (1/9/2017)
Bulls fans are under the impression that they “won” the trade where they swapped Tony Snell for him with Milwaukee. That’s cool. There’s nothing in the NBA rulebook that says that only one team can win a trade. Because the Bucks definitely won that one. But as I was saying, it’s conceivable that both teams…
Read MoreDoug McDermott 17 Points Full Highlights (1/7/2017)
I have harnessed the powers of YouTube to make it look like Doug McDermott had a good game, even though, by all measures except one, he didn’t. That one measure that makes him look kind of okay is the “clutchness” factor. McDermott, despite going 6 of 17 from the field, did hit a big three-pointer…
Read MoreDoug McDermott 17 Points Full Highlights (1/4/2017)
After spending several weeks in a confused daze after being violently and repeatedly concussed in late November, Doug McDermott has finally shaken off the inner cobwebs of his mind and is back on the court. He still doesn’t quite know where he is or who his teammates are, but his vision is clear enough to…
Read MoreCristiano Felicio 12 Points/3 Dunks Full Highlights (12/30/2016)
Cristiano “The Brazilian Shaq” Felicio has been seeing more consistent minutes lately after playing only sporadically for most of November. That previous state of affairs confused me because the Bulls have very little in the way of backup big men. Those cupboards are bare, as they say. Lopez and Gibson are the starters, and then…
Read MoreNikola Mirotic 20 Points Full Highlights (12/26/2016)
If I’m Nikola Mirotic, I think hard about going back to Europe after my rookie deal is up. Sounds crazy, I know. But it must really suck being a low-usage bench player on a middling team with a fanbase that doesn’t like you anymore after being a much-beloved beast in Europe. Actually I just looked…
Read MoreTaj Gibson 23 Points Full Highlights (12/2/2016)
I’m fully aware that Taj “Taj Maball” Gibson had five assists in the game just as you’re fully aware that I probably am not going to show them in this highlight video. One thing I’ve learned in the course of making thousands of highlight videos is that big man assists are the worst assists out…
Read MoreJerian Grant 18 Points/5 Steals Full Highlights (11/15/2016)
Count me among those who remain unconvinced by Jerian Grant. It’s well known that Phil Jackson reached when drafting him because he’s obsessed with big point guards or something, so it’s not like it’s Jerian’s fault that he’s not living up to his draft slot, but still. He was not very good in New York…
Read MoreBobby Portis 16 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2016)
He’s not playing, Bulls fans. You are aware of this. You have always been aware of this. Do you have answers, Bulls fans? I seek answers. “He” being Bobby Portis. I don’t care why Jerian Grant isn’t playing. I know why that is. It’s because he sucks. Bobby Portis doesn’t suck. At least, he didn’t…
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