Tag: Lauri Markkanen

Lauri Markkanen has the best white-dude fro in the league since, heck, I can’t remember any recent players who rocked it at all. So we’re just going to go with Brad Davis. Lauri Markkanen has the best white-dude fro in the league since Brad Davis. It’s not even that big, yet it’s the best, which…

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Lauri Markkanen has been a pretty serious slump lately, and the All-Star break didn’t help. I may have to rethink my designation of “white Kevin Durant” for him, because Durant even though he’s a cupcake doesn’t go through slumps like this. Not even in his rookie season, as far as I can tell, which isn’t…

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I think Lauri Markkanen’s arms are getting tired. The NBA season is long, the three-point line is way out there, and he’s shooting a ton of shots from back there. I think that was one of the deals with Porzingis; you could tell that he was getting fatigued in the armal area. It could be…

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This is the first, and possibly only for the whole rest of time (which according to scientists is approximately 100 quintillion years, so a long time for sure), time I have made a Lauri Markkanen highlight video that doesn’t have any three-pointers in it. The reason for that is simple: he didn’t make any three-pointers…

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There are not enough white-dude fros in the league right now. There are also not enough black-dude fros, but Lauri Markkanen is not in a position to directly address that particular problem unless he starts some sort of social media campaign. Markkanen had a bit of a fro going over the offseason when he was…

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Everyone was getting all hyped up over the upcoming matchup between Lauri Markkanen and Kristaps Porzingis, and they’re even more hyped up now that it’s over, and I just don’t get why. I think their problem is twofold. Problem 1: People like to compare Markkanen to Porzingis because of… reasons? I don’t know, but it’s…

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Man, I’m looking at Lauri Markkanen’s games this season, and he’s consistent as frick. Only 4 single-digit scoring games over the whole season so far? While averaging 15 per game? That’s really nice for a rookie. At least, it feels like it’s really nice. Maybe that’s what everyone does and I just don’t notice it….

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Attention: the move at 0:10 of this video is one of the sickest rookie plays of the year. So smooth, so under control, and we didn’t even get a replay of it. That’s one bad thing about these new timeout rules: not as much time for sick replays! I wanted several angles of Lauri Markkanen…

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Lauri “Ukkosenjumalan Poika” Markkanen, along with his partner in desecration Nikola Mirotic, just totally desecrated the Indiana Pacers with their combined Euro fury. 60 points between the two of them, 13 three pointers, I think I am allowed to say that the Bulls’ tank is now consumed by flames. No more tanking. Playoffs can still…

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The winning streak is over. It was fun while it lasted, but now the Bulls can focus their eyes back on the goal: getting the number one pick in the upcoming draft and drafting Luka Doncic. Winning is fun, sure, and it was great for their chemistry which seemed to be teetering towards toxic, but…

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