Rudy Gobert All 203 Dunks Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Dunkilation)

The tall Frenchman extended the full length of his body across the sofa. Gentle sunlight warmed him just as the glass of expensive Condrieu cooled him. Each blessed second of pastoral serenity, he tried to relish, for he knew that those seconds would eventually run out. The All-Star break would soon be ending, and he…

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Rudy Gobert All 306 Dunks Full Highlights (2018-19 Season Dunkilation Part II)

Rudy looked up from his reading as the doorbell rang, the tinkling melody causing a frown to appear on his face. Had he not instructed Remi to meet the guests at the gate? How had they made it all the way to the front door? It was no matter, Rudy supposed. The entire facade of…

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Rudy Gobert All 306 Dunks Full Highlights (2018-19 Season Dunkilation Part I)

The lanky Frenchman reclined in comfort, surrounded by the peaceful sounds and enticing scents of his well-tended Victorian garden. One of the luxurious sitting-room couches had been wrestled out of its usual place to be brought to this spot among the hedges, flowers, and decorative ferns. The fine piece of furniture would have to be…

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Rudy Gobert All 149 Dunks Full Highlights (2017-18 Season Dunkilation)

The rear porch of the estate was quiet, save for the light chirping of birds and the occasional sound of a glass being placed back on an end table. Rudy Gobert, his feet resting on an ottoman, silently pursed his lips as he perused basketball statistics on his phone. Occasionally, he would reach over and…

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Rudy Gobert All 235 Dunks Full Highlights (2016-17 Season Dunkilation)

“Monsieur Gobert! Monsieur Gobert! Your esteemed guest has arrived!” Rudy Gobert rolled his eyes at his bumbling, bespectacled butler. “If you weren’t such an intolerable fool, Remi, you would be able to take his coat and invite him in to the parlor without running to me for guidance.” “Yes, sir! Of course, sir! I will…

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Rudy Gobert 21 Points Full Highlights (5/6/2017)

Does anybody else get annoyed by the “PLAYOFF INTENSITY” fetishism that is displayed both on TV broadcasts and on the internet in general? Maybe I don’t like it when people display emotions since I myself am an emotionless semi-human, but the whole thing feels like its trying to ascribe more meaning to what is, like…

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Rudy Gobert 20 Points/5 Blocks/6 Dunks Full Highlights (3/27/2017)

When Rudy Gobert called out an unnamed teammate or teammates for playing selfishly, who was he referring to? Since I have inside sources in the Rudy Gobert camp (let’s just say that it never hurts to make friends with every sommelier you ever meet), I can shed some light on the situation in the form…

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Rudy Gobert 26 Points Full Highlights (3/25/2017)

It’s been a while since All-Star weekend, but it is still blowing my mind that Rudy Gobert was not selected to participate. Is it because he sometimes looks like an alien? Uh, that’s called discrimination, and it’s NOT okay in 2017. Aliens are people too. Here we have yet another game where Rudy Gobert “have…

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Rudy Gobert Career High 35 Points/8 Dunks Full Highlights (3/22/2017)

For hours, Rudy Gobert had been waiting patiently for his guest to wake up. He didn’t feel like waiting anymore. Retrieving a nearby bucket of ice water he had set aside specifically for this purpose, he dumped the entire contents onto the head of the unconscious man strapped to the chair. The shirtless man immediately…

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Rudy Gobert 16 Points/8 Blocks Full Highlights (3/20/2017)

8 is the most shots anyone has blocked in a game this season, tied with both of the Lopez bros. Whiteside is really slacking this year, apparently, because his name is nowhere to be found on this list of dudes who have blocked a lot of shots. That means Gobert, as of right now, is…

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