[PSA: There are no dunks in this video]
That hurts just to type. I keep unconsciously reaching for the ‘delete’ key so I can get rid of those blasphemous words. But there it is: Miles Plumlee makes seven field goals, but not one of them is a dunk.
I went into the project with high expectations. In the past, when the Plumdog Millionaire has made such a large amount of shots, at least two or three of them are dunks. Then, as I navigated through the boxscore, my enthusiasm waned and finally withered into nothing as his final shot turned out to be nothing more than a putback layup.
Now, video finished, I sit here in the dark and ponder: where did my life derail so violently that I make a highlight video where Miles Plumlee doesn’t throw down a huge slam? I go back through all the wrongs I have committed in my life, whether minor (eschewing DeMarre Carroll’s 17-point performance from a few days ago) or major (letting Martha go. Sweet Martha), and wonder whether I could have, no, should have done anything different.