“This is so mean,” Zach Randolph snickered as he and a few other Grizzlies teammates were gathered around what would be their new teammate’s locker. “That’s why it’s so awesome. Matt, you got the stuffed animals?”
“Right here,” Matt Barnes replied, pulling a backpack off his shoulders and unzipping it to reveal ten different stuffed elephant toys. “You guys gotta pay me back for this crap. I spent like sixty dollars at Toys-r-Us so we could pull this off.”
“Yeah, shut up,” Zach said, leaning in to investigate the purchases. “Looks good. All of them have really big ears, which is, of course, the whole point of this juvenile yet hilarious prank.”
Xavier Munford smiled uneasily. “Man, this is really going to hurt his feelings.” He laughed at his comment but looked nervous about the whole thing.
“Duh. That’s the point,” Zach said. “Now we just prop up these elephants all in Jordan’s locker and wait for him to get in here. Xavier, since you the second-newest, you gotta film his reaction. Maybe if he cries we can upload it to YouTube or something.”
Xavier got out his phone and looked at it sadly. “Haha. Yeah.”
—
Jordan Farmar entered the Grizzlies’ locker room feeling, if not confident, than at least not unconfident. He had switched teams plenty of times, and the introduction ritual was not new to him.
“Hey! New guy!” yelled Zach as soon as the newcomer was noticed. “You got this locker over here!” He pointed at a locker that, indeed, bore a “Jordan Farmar” nameplate above it.
As Jordan walked closer to his new locker, he quickly noticed there was something odd about it. A bunch of furry gray blobs were perched on the shelves. It didn’t take him long to realize what the joke was. “Wow. Elephants. Because I have big ears? That’s really creative.” As he reached the locker, he lazily swept all the stuffed toys onto the floor and continued, “I definitely haven’t seen that one before.”
Zach stamped his foot. “You’re supposed to start crying!” he accused.
“Why would I cry?” Jordan asked mildly.
Rolling his eyes, Zach answered, “because we’re insulting your appearance!”
“Oh. Well, at least I’m not the fat one.”
Zach had been ready to say more, but the words died in his throat. Instead, his eyes began to water, and he ran to the shower area, where heavy sobs could be heard just a few seconds later.
“I got it!” Xavier yelled, holding his phone up and running after his crying teammate.