Why does Michael Jordan hate Bismack Biyombo? What kind of twisted “talent-evaluator” would fail to see the pure potential oozing out of Bismack’s pores? First he ruined Kwame Brown, and he was well on his way to ruining this promising talent before Toronto stepped in. I’ve ragged on Bismack in the past for sucking on…
Read MoreDay: March 15, 2016
Jabari Parker 18 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
I had this big whole story typed out involving Jabari Parker turning 21 and thus being able to drink legally, except that he’s Mormon so he can’t. His teammates were being real dicks to him, let me tell you, in this story. I don’t want to give away too much, but there was a scene…
Read MoreSean Kilpatrick 19 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
Sean Kilpatrick, officially, needs to score at least 20 before I’ll consider making highlights of him again. The market has become saturated with vids of him scoring 19, and I fear that any more after this will cause the bubble to burst, devaluing Kilswitch highlights forever. This cannot be allowed to happen. Good news is…
Read MoreNorman Powell 17 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
“Why do scrubs always go off on us?” is the bewildered cry of every NBA fan. It doesn’t seem fair; why should a player who is, by all accounts, not that great of a player, get to score any points at all against your favorite team? It’s ridiculous. And it always happens. Why? The reasons…
Read MoreAaron Gordon 16 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
Why don’t people use the nickname “Air Gordon” for Aaron Gordon? I just thought it up all by myself, and from what I can tell, it’s basically the perfect nickname. Because his name is Gordon and he gets up in the air to do sweet dunks. Is it because everybody’s afraid of getting sued by…
Read MoreJonas Jerebko 17 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
I’m so sorry. These are the last five players I have showcased on my channel: Jonas Jerebko Jason Smith Nik Stauskas Evan Fournier Bojan Bogdanovic Notice a trend? Yes. These are all highlights of white-skinned players. It’s okay if you unsubscribe. I don’t blame you. In fact, I encourage you to do so. I’m sick…
Read MoreJason Smith 25 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
Imagine my surprise and delight when it turns out that erstwhile highlight-god dorell15 made highlights of when Jason Smith scored his career high 26 points back in 2012! You don’t even have to imagine, I’ll just tell you: I was surprised and delighted TO THE MAX. Those highlights and these highlights look very similar, except…
Read MoreNik Stauskas 18 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
“Put ‘Career High’ in the title you stubborn bastard. Do you think I’m playing around here? Just do it!”, Adam Silver yells at me through our forced Skype chat, his face contorted with rage. “I defy you!”, I respond coolly, my face not betraying my inner fear. “DO IT!” “I shall always defy you!” “Defiance…
Read MoreEvan Fournier 30 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
Attention to those dudes who compile all the “fights” that occur in the NBA only for the videos to get taken down because the NBA doesn’t want people to see that sometimes players have emotions: we’ve got a new dustup to add to your compilations! Evan Fournier versus Nikola Jokic. France versus Serbia. White versus…
Read MoreBojan Bogdanovic Career High 44 Points Full Highlights (3/15/2016)
Damn. 44 points by Bojan Bogdanovic? Such a thing should not be possible, yet here we are, witnessing the feat with our very eyes. If I didn’t myself compile these highlights, I would choose to believe that the boxscore was lying to me rather than accept a reality where Bojangles put up a 40-burger. But…
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