Behold: the first video for Ekpe “Squidward” Udoh on DownToBuck’s archivium of scrubs. I ignored him for the whole time he was on the Bucks, and then he went to the Clippers to ride pine, and then he disappeared to Turkey so he could start a book club. And it’s not like he was too…
Read MoreDay: January 11, 2018
Mario Hezonja 13 Points/3 Dunks Full Highlights (1/10/2018)
Luckily I missed tonight’s Bucks game, otherwise I would have had to witness D.J. Wilson suck so bad that even the Magic commentators felt it necessary to call him out. Why do I let myself get hyped for Bucks rookies again? You can witness a small sample of his suckitude in this Mario Hezonja highlight…
Read MoreGary Harris 25 Points Full Highlights (1/10/2018)
After exclusive analysis and digital forensics on the footage of Gary Harris’ commentator-befuddling phantom injury after a shooting foul against the Hawks, I have determined with 100 percent scientific accuracy what happened to him: Mason Plumlee, going for a high-five, accidentally slapped him right in the testicles. Don’t you hate it when that happens? Hanging…
Read MoreRicky Rubio 21 Points Full Highlights (1/10/2018)
Ricky Rubio’s assist numbers are way down from last year, a result of him moving from the Timberwolves’ “spam pick-and-pops with KAT” system to the Jazz’s “take the ball out of Ricky’s hands so some flashy rookie can play with it” system. It’s a shame, but what can you do? His hot shooting percentages to…
Read MoreJarrett Jack Triple Double 16 Pts/10 Rebs/10 Asts Full Highlights (1/10/2018)
Jarrett Jack with the first Knick triple-double since Carmelo back in 2012. I don’t know what’s more surprising, the fact that the triple-double revolution of last year totally passed them by, or that Carmelo managed to dig 10 assists out of his crusty butthole. Or the fact that Jarrett “Out Of The League” Jack came…
Read MoreMichael Beasley 26 Points Full Highlights (1/10/2018)
The Knicks probably would’ve won this game if Michael Beasley had continued his hot shooting into the overtime periods. That makes it sound like I’m blaming him, but I’m not. Really. Well, a little bit. Kind of. But you could say the same for any of the Knicks players: if they scored more, their team…
Read MoreLauri Markkanen Career High 33 Points/8 Threes Full Highlights (1/10/2018)
Everyone was getting all hyped up over the upcoming matchup between Lauri Markkanen and Kristaps Porzingis, and they’re even more hyped up now that it’s over, and I just don’t get why. I think their problem is twofold. Problem 1: People like to compare Markkanen to Porzingis because of… reasons? I don’t know, but it’s…
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