Since I know that nobody is going to watch this video (it’s Courtney Lee, after all), I am going to institute a new “highlight suitability” protocol to more accurately determine when a Courtney Lee highlight video needs to be made. It will use a proprietary algorithm, developed in-house, running on a state-of-the-art neural net, to…
Read MoreDay: January 24, 2018
Jarrett Allen 12 Points/1 Three Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
Jarrett Allen is a 43% three-point shooter. His only problem is his extremely low, bordering on anemic, volume from the threezone: he’s 3 of 7 for the season. That hardly qualifies him as a “stretch five”, but then again, maybe it does a little bit. It’s hard to extract meaningful information from so few shot…
Read MoreElfrid Payton 21 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
There was a period of time last season when it seemed like Elfrid Payton was getting a triple-double every other game. I’m sure the frequency wasn’t that high, but that’s what it felt like to me, since I was the one who had to make all those damn highlight videos. This year, however, Payton has…
Read MoreKyle Kuzma 28 Points Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
If there’s anything I’ve learned in life, it’s that high-school to college-aged males love wearing T-Shirts that have references to marijuana on them. That’s why, when I came up with the phrase “Kyle Kushma” in reference to the popular Lakers rookie Kyle Kuzma, I immediately went out to the local shirt-printing place and ordered like…
Read MoreMarcus Smart 22 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
Marcus Smart missed a buzzer-beating three-pointer as time expired, but if the Lakers could actually shoot free throws (Josh Fart missed a pair with nineteen seconds left and Kentavious Callbrick-Poop missed a pair with five seconds left), Smart wouldn’t have even had a chance to take (and miss) the game-winner, so I consider this one…
Read MoreDejounte Murray 19 Points/7 Steals Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
Dejounte Murray: best rebounding guard in the league? Russell Westbrook doesn’t count because he’s a statpadder and everyone knows it. Murray might be a statpadder, but even if he is, no one but Spurs fans would be aware. So he wins. He is the best rebounding guard in the league. If he could shoot the…
Read MoreMichael Beasley 21 Points Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
It’s not too late! It’s not too late! #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley Come on! Come on people! We can do this! #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael Beasley #NBAVote Michael…
Read MoreJoe Harris 19 Points Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
Is it too late to get Joe Harris in the three-point shootout? I don’t think it is. I know with All-Star voting there was a hashtag you could use to register your support for a certain player. Is there such a thing for the shootout? #shootoutvote Joe Harris Sadly, even if that vote was counted…
Read MoreWillie Cauley-Stein 21 Points/5 Blocks Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
I’ve been making a bunch of videos recently showing Willie Cauley-Stein using his whole offensive arsenal. He’s been branching out lately, which is nice, but this is not one of those videos. In this video, he dunks the ball a whole bunch of times and erases a whole bunch of pathetic shots by the Magic….
Read MoreGarrett Temple Career High 34 Points Full Highlights (1/23/2018)
“Silence! The King is making his entrance!” Garrett Temple announced as he strutted into the locker room, shirtless. “Please make way for the King!” Vince Carter smiled. “You know, man, technically we’re all kings, since we play for the…” “SILENCE! Who talked while the King was talking? I do not remember giving anyone permission to…
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