I’m really digging Jonas Valanciunas’ beard this season. It looks good. Lots of volume, good shaping. Not one of those “well I’m in my mid-twenties now so I guess I’ll try one out” things that’s all patchy and pubey (Kelly Olynyk I’m CALLING YOU OUT). It looks like head hair except it’s on the bottom…
Read MoreMonth: March 2018
D’Angelo Russell 32 Points/7 Threes Full Highlights (3/13/2018)
D’Angelo Russell hit 7 threes in the first 6 minutes and 30 seconds of tonight’s game versus the Raptors. It says it right there in the title of the vid: “7 Threes”. Which means, of course, that he didn’t make a single one after that point. I think everyone on earth is disappointed right now….
Read MoreJustise Winslow 15 Points Full Highlights (3/12/2018)
How far above their season average does a player have to score to earn the distinction of having had a “scoring outburst”? Because I’ve been sitting here looking at the Heat-Blazers boxscore for about fifteen minutes now, and all I can think about is how Justise Winslow might have just had a scoring outburst and…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 27 Points/3 Blocks Full Highlights (3/12/2018)
As is often the case with Jusuf Nurkic’s high-scoring performances, this one features a lot of wild shots at the rim which happen to go in. Does he even bother locating the rim before throwing the ball up in its general vicinity? This video also features a lot of ragdoll physics as he uses his…
Read MoreJustin Jackson 15 Points Full Highlights (3/12/2018)
The season is getting close to its end, only a month left or so, and I’m proud to say that I’ve finally stopped typing Josh Jackson when I really meant to type Justin Jackson. It was a lot of hard work, training my mind and fingers to not key the name of the much more…
Read MoreDerrick White 14 Points Full Highlights (3/12/2018)
The commonly accepted wisdom is that the Spurs are good at developing young talent. The best, even. I have been working tirelessly to put an end to that blatant lie. I just got done with a 4-hour stint standing in front of my local fire department with a sandwich board that said on both sides…
Read MoreBogdan Bogdanovic 19 Points Full Highlights (3/12/2018)
I’m still so amped up from Brandon Jennings dropping 16 and 12 that I’m having trouble forming coherent thoughts about any other subject. Like, I try to think about Bogdan Bogdanovic and how he scored 19 which isn’t even that good for him anymore, and my mind butts in and says “oh yeah but Jennings…
Read MoreBrandon Jennings 16 Points/12 Assists/1 Return Full Highlights (3/12/2018)
Brandon Jennings is back in Milwaukee. Baddy Chuckerson McNobrains, as he was affectionately called. The last we saw of him in the Bucks’ green and red, he was scoring 3 points on 1 of 7 shooting with 1 assist in 22 minutes as his team got done getting swept by the Heatles. An era that…
Read MoreJoe Ingles 20 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/11/2018)
Unlike past Joe Ingles videos, which were deficient in the amount of jingling contained in their runtime, I have determined that this video contains adequate amounts of jingling. A player with the nickname “Jinglin’ Joe” is obligated by social norms to provide jingles, and in this case, the jingles were definitely provided. The video evidence…
Read MoreBobby Portis 21 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/11/2018)
Bobby “Crazy Eyes” Portis: a legit stretch four? Question mark? I would say, yeah, he totally is a legit stretch four. Legitimately. He’s only shooting 34% on three-pointers, but that’s legit enough where teams have to guard him at that distance. They can’t just let him shoot those shots. Or they could, if they’re tanking…
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