November 19, 2018 – Page 2

Damion Lee 13 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

I’m digging this new thing where NBA players tie their headbands in the back like they just stepped out of the Mortal Kombat series or Dragonball Z or something. What better way to intimidate your defender than to have your headwear be vaguely reminiscent of, like, an ancient Japanese warrior wielding a katana made of…

Lance Stephenson 19 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

I might have a low opinion of points scored in “garbage time” (they should be stricken from the record or at least put into a separate “garbage time” box-score so that they don’t sully the legitimate stats), but I don’t really care one way or the other if players want to score on the last…

Buddy Hield 23 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

My twelve-foot-tall purple plastic 3D-printed naked statue of Buddy Hield, as I’ve mentioned previously, has really been into goats lately. The better part of the last month, he’s occupied his days by using my laptop to watch videos of goats on YouTube. So I started making plans to take him to the zoo in the…

Marvin Bagley 16 Points/4 Dunks Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

It is true that Marvin Bagley had four dunks in this game. Unlike certain past occasions where the official NBA box-score has lied to me about the nature of a made field goal, these are all, uncontroversially, dunks. However, two of the four dunks are of such a sedate quality that I feel guilty for…

D.J. Augustin 22 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

D.J. Augustin opened his eyes and knew immediately that something was wrong. His surroundings were completely unfamiliar, and a man wearing a mask and robe was standing above him. His form was illuminated dimly by flickering candles which ringed the stone dais upon which D.J. lay. “You were not supposed to awaken,” the man said…

Fred VanVleet 18 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

Fred “Vleet of Voot” VanVleet got his first career start against the Bulls and promptly had his best game of the season. This begs the question: has VanVleet been held back by being shoehorned into the “bench mob” role this entire time? This game, in addition to showing us that VanVleet is a more than…

Danny Green 17 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

I pretty much only made this video because it was a straight-up perfect shooting performance (seven-of-seven) with no free throws. That’s perfect for making a highlight video. If Michelangelo had been born half a millennium later, he wouldn’t be writing treatises on the perfect human form for his paintings or sculptures; he would be making…

Gary Harris 24 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

Time for a shameful confession: my hype for Gary Harris is lower this season than it has been in previous seasons. Don’t get me wrong. I’m still #hypedforgaryharris. It’s just that, I don’t know, it seems like he’s not having these hyper-efficient scoring show-outs as often this season as he was last season. The stats…

Joe Harris 19 Points Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

On one hand, it’s cool that Joe Harris did much of his scoring in this game off the dribble. Maybe the defense was preventing him from getting to his preferred shooting spots, or maybe they were just closing out extra hard, forcing him to cut towards the basket instead of popping a three like he…

D’Angelo Russell 23 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (11/17/2018)

DownToBuck is a man of fashion. So when I saw these Nets alternate jerseys, I knew I had to have some of the stuff that inspired them in the first place. So I searched “Biggie Smalls sweater” in the Googs, which is slightly too bad because now they think I like rap when I don’t…