Kyle O’Quinn sat down at his writing desk, his inner words eagerly awaiting their release onto paper. He picked up his quill pen and, as if guided by unknown cosmic forces, wrote: “Eire, the emerald isle, my true home. How I yearn for the green expanses of your valleys, the brown cliffs, the blue waters….
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JaVale McGee 21 Points/7 Dunks Full Highlights (3/27/2013)
JaVale McGee was lounging on his patio on the cold winter’s night, fresh from a long soak in his hot tub. Swathed in a mauve robe, he lay supine on his recamier, considering the majesty of the eternal cosmos. Suddenly his phone rang. He seemed to not notice it for a few seconds, but eventually…
Read MoreTobias Harris Career High 29 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (3/27/2013)
Is Tobias Harris a good player? You can take a look at his stats or, better yet, watch him in game and probably will come to the conclusion that he is, indeed, a good player. But the team he is on is really bad. So how good can he really be? Isn’t he just a…
Read MoreJJ Barea 21 Points Full Highlights (3/26/2013)
The Timberwolves hit 13 (actually 14 oops) threes tonight against the Pistons, which is notable since they are a horrible three-point shooting team, by far the worst in the league. Love, Rubio, Ridnour, Williams, Kirilenko, Shved and Gelabale are all shooting below 32% on the season. Their best three baller is shooting a paltry 34%….
Read MoreDarius Miller Career High 16 Points Full Highlights (3/25/2013)
Darius “D-Mill” Miller can be summed up in one word. Basketball player. Okay, two words, but you get the idea. D-Mill is a basketball player. That’s what he does. How does he compare to other basketball players with the last name Miller? Mike Miller: Way better than D-Mill, but is old and stricken with back…
Read MoreRyan Anderson 23 Points Full Highlights (3/25/2013)
Stephen Curry is the best three-point shooter in the league. But who’s in second place? Since this is a Ryan Anderson video, we’re going with Ryan Anderson on this one. Not only does his range extend two feet beyond the arc, but he can shoot it in the face of any defender. When he gets…
Read MoreArnett Moultrie Career High 14 Points Full Highlights (3/25/2013)
“Yo ‘Nett wanna go bowling?” “Drew, man, I don’t know if that’s a good idea. You can barely walk and remember what happened last time? I still hear your screams when I try to sleep.” “Fine I’ll just ask Royal he’s always down for some tenpin action.” “Just don’t let Collins find out he’s already…
Read MoreBrian Roberts 13 Points/Career High 18 Assists Full Highlights (3/25/2013)
This is a crazy performance. It’s right up there with Dalembert’s 35 points for the most unexpected, out-of-the-blue statline of the year. How does this even happen? And it’s not like the scorekeepers were preparing some nice delicious home-cooking. All of the assists were legit except for the penultimate one on the Miller layup. It…
Read MoreOrlando Johnson Career High 15 Points Full Highlights (3/25/2013)
Is Orlando Johnson any good? I solicited an opinion from his mother, who had this to say: “Oh, my boy Orlando, he’s such a good boy. I’m so proud of him, he’s done us all well. It’s all due to God’s will that he was blessed with this opportunity. I just wish he’d come visit…
Read MoreLavoy Allen Career High 20 Points Full Highlights (3/24/2013)
The 76ers have had a very disappointing season. Granted, when you replace Andrew Bynum with a motley crew of Spencer Hawes (soft), Lavoy Allen (fat), and Arnett Moultrie (just straight up not any good), you expect a dip in wins. But I don’t know if Bynum’s mangled knees are entirely to blame. They’re just so…
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