I have to admit, whoever came up with the nickname “Serge Protector” for Serge Ibaka is a much cleverer man than I. It’s perfect. It’s the perfect nickname. I bow before thee and thy superior moniker-creation skills. However, whoever came up with the idea to play a car crash sound effect after Ibaka blocks a…
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Wesley Matthews 26 Points Full Highlights (12/10/2016)
How many times is Wesley Matthews going to score 26 points? I feel like 10% of my total vids this year have been him scoring that many points, and I’m getting sick of it. 30 isn’t that much more than 26, but I bet tons of people would watch highlights of such a performance if…
Read MoreRudy Gobert 17 Points/6 Blocks Full Highlights (12/10/2016)
Quiz time! First (and last) question: What kind of a bitch was DeMarcus Cousins made into by Rudy Gobert? A. A bitch B. A big fat bitch C. The biggest bitch in the whole wide world D. A stupid bitch if there ever was a bitch E. A bitch to all the boys and girls…
Read MoreJuan Hernangomez 14 Points/4 Threes Full Highlights (12/10/2016)
Juancho Hernangomez: already better than Victor Claver ever was? I’m only talking about the NBA here. Their respective careers in Europe are of no interest to me; do I look like DownToReal to you? Victor Claver was a pretty large disappointment for me. He played three years for Portland while never EVER doing anything of…
Read MoreKelly Oubre Career High 19 Points Full Highlights (12/10/2016)
Attention females: Kelly Oubre Jr. isn’t even that good looking. He only looks good because, when he’s on the bench, he gets to sit between Andrew Nicholson who looks like a black smurf and Jason Smith who is totally balding. That’s the only reason. Take him out of his normal NBA habitat, and he becomes…
Read MoreMirza Teletovic 25 Points Full Highlights (12/10/2016)
One of the clearest warning signs of a coach who has no idea what’s going on is the random insertion and uninsertion of players into a lineup. Take Mirza Teletovic for example (you could also use Greg Monroe earlier in the season, or Rashad Vaughn, or Miles Plumlee). Jason Kidd didn’t play Mirza at all…
Read MoreDorian Finney-Smith 12 Points Full Highlights (12/9/2016)
Dorian Finney-Smith just tallied a new career-high of twelve points after scoring eleven points a week ago. This is what is called “progress”. You might not have heard of it considering you’ve made none of it either in your romantic or professional life. Watching NBA highlight videos on the internet doesn’t count as any kind…
Read MoreMichael Kidd-Gilchrist 16 Points Full Highlights (12/9/2016)
We’re just going to have to face facts here: Michael Kidd-Gilchrist will never be a primary offensive threat for any team. Ever. To be such a thing would require having either a go-to post game or a go-to jumpshot; MKG has neither. He will be relegated to scoring garbage baskets near the rim for his…
Read MoreDerrick Williams 17 Points Full Highlights (12/9/2016)
“That looks cool, you a DJ or something?” asked Wayne Ellington, noticing the Digital Audio Workstation that was open on Derrick Williams’ laptop. “Not quite. I’m creating audio art but I wouldn’t call myself a DJ,” Derrick replied as he rearranged tracks and fiddled with digital knobs. “Audio art? You mean music?” Wayne responded, eyebrows…
Read MoreLou Williams 35 Points Full Highlights (12/9/2016)
I may have erred when I (prematurely) crowned Wilson Chandler with the 6MOTY Of The Year crown. Both Lou Williams and Wilson Chandler are leading their respective teams in scoring, but Lou is doing it while scoring more points. He also had thirty-five in his last game; Chandler had five points on 2-of-16 from the…
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