“Hey Arron, check out this new track I’m working on.” Arron Afflalo looked across the aisle of the bus to see Derrick Williams hard at work on his laptop. “That’s cool man, I’m good,” he answered. He had heard rumors around the league about Derrick and his odd fondness for certain types of electronic music….
Read MoreLuis Scola 20 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
I don’t get how Luis Scola can be 35 years old and still be this useful. It’s unlikely that he’s able to produce any defense out of his aging body, but the same body that can no longer defend anything resembling an NBA player is also the same body that abuses Chris Bosh with savvy…
Read MoreJae Crowder Career High 24 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
Jae Crowder’s dreads just look more pillowy by the day. In real life they’re probably all prickly and stiff, but on my computer monitor they look like thick ropes made out of pure bunny fur. I want to touch them. I want to fondle them. Is there somebody I can contact to make this happen?…
Read MoreDennis Schröder 22 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
Dennis Schröder put the earbuds in his ears, leaned back, and closed his eyes: his typical pregame relaxation ritual. His Hawks teammates knew not to disturb him unless absolutely necessary, for a meditative Dennis was a much better performer than a nervous Dennis. As German-language pop music flowed through his ears, Dennis relaxed fully, his…
Read MoreNikola Vucevic 25 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
A dedicated viewer of this channel might notice something strange: after 11 Okafor highlights, 10 Towns highlights, and 2(???) JaMychal Green highlights, this is only my second Nikola Vucevic video! I’m not racist or anything, in case that’s what you were thinking. I love Montenegro and its denizens. Montenegro and DTB are bros for life….
Read MoreJahlil Okafor 20 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
What was Jahlil Okafor’s favorite thing about prom? The punch bowl!
Read MoreJaVale McGee 10 Points/5 Dunks/3 Blocks Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
Nothing makes me happier than seeing a rejuvenated JaVale McGee up to his old tricks. The NBA just hasn’t been the same without him, and I’m not even talking about all that BS Shaqtin stuff. I’m talking about big blocks and even bigger slam-jams. And, yes, some funny faces thrown in for good measure. Sadly,…
Read MoreAndre Drummond Career High 33 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
Alright, I know I said that I was only going to care about on-court explots from now on. I said it, and I mean to follow through with it, but man, some things are just too much to ignore. Like Andre Drummond’s shoulder hair. I mean, what the hell? It’s like a carpet. A prickly…
Read MoreC.J. McCollum 27 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
OFFICIAL 2015 NBA JUMP-SHOOTERS BETTER THAN CJ MCCOLLUM POWER RANKINGS 1. Stephen Curry 2. Kyle Korver 3. Klay Thompson 4. Damian Lillard 5. ????????????? 6. James Harden or something Maybe I forgot a few names, so sue me. We’re talking about jump-shot making ability here, not just threes, nor “who can jack up a bunch…
Read MoreSerge Ibaka 23 Points Full Highlights (12/17/2015)
Serge “Ibaka Gaijin” Ibaka only had one block in this game. That’s stupid. I don’t like it. He’s supposed to be an automaton that mindlessly generates blocks for his team. But one block is the same amount that Spencer Hawes got last night. Sure, Ibaka had 10 total blocks in the previous two games, but…
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